“You didn’t bring me a baby back then, don’t let me take care of it now.” Netizens did the right thing and let my daughter-in-law go.
The contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law seems to be a problem of the century, whether in the distant feudal society or today’s enlightened information In the modern age, it is difficult to maintain a harmonious relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
If the son has a high EQ, he can still reap the benefits, but if he is not online, he will be angry at both ends and become impersonal inside and out. Especially after the third generation, the question of whether the mother-in-law should help the daughter-in-law with the baby will become the fuse of the conflict.
Xiao Di and her husband are college classmates. They got married after graduation. They had a son soon after they got married. Because both of them had to work and make money, Xiao Di discussed with her husband. The mother-in-law came from her hometown to help with the children.
The mother-in-law agreed at first, but within a few days she said that she was unwell and had to go back to her hometown to recover. Xiao Di had no choice but to let her mother-in-law go back, but within two days, she heard that the sister-in-law had also given birth to a child, and the mother-in-law went directly to the sister-in-law’s house to help others bring the baby.
Xiao Di was very uncomfortable, but she didn’t say anything. She quit her job and brought her own baby. Her husband is very busy with business. He often works overtime and ignores Xiao Di. The child is sick and Xiao Di is alone. Being a father and a mother to take care of the children, and finally the children slept, Xiao Di was busy doing housework again, often unable to take care of a meal a day.
Finally, the child went to kindergarten, and Xiao Di was able to go out to find a job. But at this time, her mother-in-law suddenly suffered a stroke and was paralyzed in bed. Xiao Di went back to take care of her mother-in-law with her husband.
Xiao Di took care of her mother-in-law for two months in her hometown. Seeing that the situation is basically stable, she proposed to go back to work. After all, the child also has to go to school.
But the mother-in-law burst into tears when she heard it, saying that Xiaodi, no matter what she was living or dead, was that she had to go to work, and her son and daughter-in-law didn’t support herself, so she just died.
When Xiao Di heard her mother-in-law’s words, she didn’t get angry, and asked her mother-in-law, “You didn’t care about the hardest time when I had a child. Now I have no obligation to take care of you. Who did you give to? Bring a child, let someone take care of you!”
Many daughter-in-laws also talked about their energy on the Internet. Most of them are because the mother-in-law is unwilling to come and help after the child is born. Then, when the mother-in-law is old, you There is no foreign body for the elderly care of the mother-in-law.
Netizens think that this sentence is okay, after all, the daughter-in-law is not biological, and there is indeed no foreign body to support the mother-in-law. So when facing the question of whether the mother-in-law should help the daughter-in-law with the baby, which one is right and wrong?
Mother-in-law should not Should the daughter-in-law bring the baby
Regarding whether the mother-in-law is obligated to help the son and daughter-in-law bring the baby, different positions have their own difficulties. As young couples, they have their own jobs and careers.
After having a child, it is not realistic to bring a baby at home full-time. After all, a loss of income will put a lot of pressure on the family. Nowadays, it is not safe to hire a babysitter, so it is indeed necessary for the elderly Come and take care of it.
As a mother-in-law, she has worked so hard to raise her son for college, and also worry about his son’s marriage. It’s hard to watch her son get married and set up a family.
But after the son and daughter-in-law had a child, he ordered that he had to carry his bags and go to his son’s house as a babysitter. Although he was a biological son, he was not at home after all. There would always be a feeling of being left behind, especially some mother-in-laws were still not far from home. Traveling thousands of miles to a big city and being unfamiliar with the place of life will be very lonely and depressed.
So logically speaking, the mother-in-law does not have to help the son and daughter-in-law to bring the baby with the foreign object, and the law does not require the mother-in-law to help raise the third generation. However, emotionally speaking, the first few years after giving birth are the most difficult time for the daughter-in-law. If the mother-in-law is weak, it will inevitably make the daughter-in-law feel dissatisfied and intensify the conflict between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law.
Do you have a wife Foreign matter for the elderly care of the mother-in-law
As for whether the daughter-in-law provides foreign matter for the elderly care of the mother-in-law, there is no such explicit stipulation in the law, because although the daughter-in-law is married to the mother-in-law’s family, it does not mean that she must bear the responsibility of providing for the mother-in-law. Not a biological child.
So the mother-in-law can’t ask her daughter-in-law to provide for herself, but as a daughter-in-law, she can’t completely ignore the elderly. After all, everyone has a day of getting old, not to mention the husband who does not have the mother-in-law, so it is reasonable Above all, the daughter-in-law cannot completely ignore her mother-in-law.
How to reconcile mother-in-law and daughter-in-law Contradiction
To get along well with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law and avoid conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, every member of the family needs to correct their mentality and shoulder their own responsibilities, and at the same time not to excessively interfere with each other in the name of love.
The man standing between the two women first, that is, as a son, must play a benign role in reconciling the mother and wife. Tell your mother more about his wife, and more about his wife. It’s not easy for mothers to shoulder the responsibilities of being a son and husband, and don’t shirk their foreign objects to others.
As a daughter-in-law, treat her mother-in-law with respect and politeness as much as possible. Although the mother-in-law is not a real mother, she does not have to become an enemy. Finally, as a mother-in-law, if your son and daughter-in-law really need help when your situation permits, they should try their best to help each other. The contributions between people are mutual.
If there are conflicts, both mother-in-law and daughter-in-law must step back and have a harmonious family relationship, which will also be of great benefit to the growth of the next generation. The newborn has not opened his eyes for 5 days. This scene during the hospital examination made Bao’s mother so embarrassed that she immediately apologized
Most babies have their eyes closed after birth, usually after 1~2 days. Quietly opened his eyes to take a look at this brand new world.
Of course, everyone knows that newborn babies sleep for a long time. They sleep for more than 20 hours a day. The rest of the time is basically either breastfeeding or crying. Occasionally, most of the free time is It was before going to bed.
Of course, not all babies will open their eyes within a day or two after birth, and it may take longer. A mother of a treasure in Hainan, whose baby was born last week, was given a normal delivery method. After being in the hospital for 2 days, she was discharged and returned home.
When we arrived at the door of the house, the mother-in-law was about to go in and take out an umbrella to cover her. She was afraid that the sun might hurt the child’s eyes too much, but Bao’s mother didn’t think it mattered, so she hugged the child and got out of the car. The child’s eyes have also received the baptism of vision, but at this time the child’s eyes are closed.
Two days after returning home, the mother-in-law felt strange, why did the child no longer open his eyes after the fifth day? So I suspected that it was the sunburn that day, and the child’s eyes were sunburned. No wonder the child kept crying that night, and the secretion from the corners of the eyes increased in the past two days.
With such related factors and deductions, Bao’s mother also became anxious. She felt that what the mother-in-law said made sense, so she hurriedly took the child to see a doctor. As a result, when the child was held in front of the doctor, Momma Bao had just finished talking about the child’s symptoms. What she didn’t expect was that the child opened his eyes at this time.
For a while, Bao Ma was embarrassed and didn’t know what to say, so she quickly apologized to the doctor, “I haven’t opened my eyes at home before, what’s the matter.” It can be said that Bao’s mother was in another state at the time. Happy and embarrassed.
The doctor reassures, “This situation is also normal. As long as the newborn’s eyes are not exposed to direct sunlight for a long time, nothing will happen. You only have a few seconds that day, and the child’s eyes are still There is no problem with the closed one.”
“There is nothing wrong with the child’s eyes, but the child is lazy. Sometimes he opens his eyes, or you didn’t notice it.”
After a series of answers from the doctor, Bao Ma finally relieved her mind. Although she had an oolong, but fortunately, the child had nothing to do.
Why are some babies Reluctant to open your eyes after birth?
1. The eyes feel the light stimulation and do not want to open their eyes
When the baby is in the mother’s belly, he can only feel the weak light during the day, so their eyes can only adapt to the light. Faint eyes.
Newborn babies are not yet able to adapt to the light of the new world, so most of them are reluctant to open their eyes, forcing them to make them feel more comfortable.
2. Continue the habit
Be aware that the baby basically keeps his eyes closed when he is in the mother’s stomach, so after birth, most of them will not open at first The consciousness of the eyes just continued the state in the mother’s belly and closed his eyes.
3. Parents missed the time when they opened their eyes
Most children’s sleep time is relatively long, sometimes even 22 hours of sleep, which also means that their waking time is free for 1 to 2 hours. It’s actually quite rare to catch them opening their eyes in this process.
The baby may open his eyes when he wakes up, but the duration is also very short, and then he closes his eyes and cries until he is picked up to breastfeed, and after he enters the state of breastfeeding, of course he has to start enjoying , Eyes closed is still the norm. Occasionally when “appreciating the face”, the babies may open their eyes and look at you.
Babies don’t want to open their eyes, don’t force them!
Some parents see that the baby hasn’t opened their eyes, so they try to roll their eyes, or stimulate the children to open their eyes. These are improper practices and may cause the children’s eyes to become infected or inflamed.
After all, the eyes of newborns are not fully developed, and the fingers of adults contain a lot of bacteria, which is very easy to cause infections in children, and forcibly breaking the eyes of children can easily lead to capillaries in the children’s eyes. Or the lens of the eyeball is injured.
Protect your baby’s eyes. This should be done.
1) Avoid strong light
In the room where the newborn baby is located, it is best not to turn on too bright light, otherwise it may It can irritate their eyes, especially when they are asleep. When they just wake up, even adults will feel glare, let alone newborns. Of course, the low light cannot be maintained all the time, and it is not conducive to the child’s eye development.
2) Pay attention to eye cleanliness. When the baby is sleeping, the mothers can try to clean the eyes of the baby, especially in the case of eye feces, try to clean with a disposable cotton towel dipped in warm water, which is less likely to cause irritation to the baby.
3) Go to the hospital if you have a problem. Some mothers see that the baby’s eyes are red and swollen, or have other problems, so they give the baby eye drops without authorization, which is very likely to aggravate the injury.
Once you find that your baby’s moving eyes have problems, you must see a doctor as soon as possible, instead of being a doctor at home for your baby. The wrong operation may even cause the baby to lose his sight. How to bear the consequences?