Why are some children reluctant to be close to their mothers? Mostly you made a mistake when you were young, change it in time

Why are some children reluctant to be close to their mothers? It’s probably because you made a mistake when you were young. Correct it in time.

Writer: Chen Fang

Editor: Liu Yizhi

Finalized: Su Zihou

It is said that “a child is a piece of meat from the mother”. According to this statement, the mother and child should be the closest. But this is often not the case in life. Some children are not close to their mothers, or even very distant. 

The pictures in this article are all from the Internet , The picture and text have nothing to do.

Growing up without companionship, mother-child relationship is drifting away

When Liu Jing was young, she was a strong woman. She has been conscientious in her work and has been doing this since she was pregnant. Only when they are in production are they willing to let go of work. 

After the child was born, she decisively chose milk powder feeding and asked her mother-in-law to take care of her, and she returned to work as soon as she was out of confinement. 

The child is getting older. When she started school, Liu Jing’s job was relatively stable, so she wanted to take care of her herself. But the problem arises. The child doesn’t want her to touch it at all. As long as she takes care of it, he starts crying and can only let the mother-in-law take care of it all the time. 

Liu Jing thought that when the child was older, he would be sensible, but later he ran counter to Liu Jing’s ideas. The relationship between the two parties became more and more alienated. There was almost no communication. At this time, Liu Jing felt very regretful. 

Mom made these mistakes when she was young, and children often do not want to be close to you when they grow up

1. Lack of companionship and care

This problem It is commonly seen in career mothers. They usually spend more time at work and neglect the growth of their children, causing them to feel insecure. 

When they grow up, children are more willing to find a sense of security in other ways, rather than getting it from their mother, because they subconsciously think it is difficult to get it from their mother. 

2, eccentric

This problem is mainly aimed at families with two or more children. Some mothers cannot treat their children in a fair way, and there are even obvious differences that cannot give equal love. 

This will cause this unfavored child to have a psychological gap, doubt about himself, doubt whether he is good enough, and produce inferiority complex. At the same time, he will reject the mother and think that he cannot give himself. Enough care. 

3. Lack of communication


Many families may choose the method of beating and scolding during education, but they did not communicate in time after beating and scolding, nor did they explain why. This not only does not play any educational role, but also makes the child feel afraid and dare not get close to the mother. 

To establish a close mother-child relationship, you need to do these few.

Equal care

Generally, there are several children in the family, and it is easy for mothers to prefer one of them and ignore them. To the feelings of other children. Therefore, when doing anything, you should be equal, and don’t favor one another, hurt your children, and create a gap between them. 

Grow with you

Growing up is a very complicated and long process, in which many small and piecemeal things may have a significant impact on the child. If mothers can’t participate, they naturally have no way to understand their growth, nor can they understand their behavior. 

The same is true for children. A childhood without a mother is incomplete, especially when other children have them but they don’t. So no matter how busy you are, you must spare enough time to accompany and take care of your children’s growth. 

Get along as friends< /p>

In the family, parents have the same idea in many aspects, which is a kind of loneliness for children. Therefore, when getting along with them, mothers don’t have to take the posture of elders, but get along as friends, which makes it easier to become intimate and harmonious. 

Try not to beat and scold

The education method of “good people from the yellow wattle” has been behind and eliminated. This method often aggravates the contradiction between mother and child. It will make the child fear to be close to the mother. Therefore, in family education, try to abandon this kind of education. 

Knowledge extension: building close relationships The critical period

A series of psychological studies have shown that: 0~3 years old is the critical period for establishing an intimate relationship with a child. 

At this stage, the baby is still immature in all aspects of development. When he first arrived in this strange world, he has doubts and anxiety about many things. At this stage, his sense of security comes from taking care of him. People living. 

Therefore, if conditions permit, parents must be with him at this stage. If there is any reason for having to leave, they must also be able to stay with him within 12 months . 

The survey shows that during this period If children are separated from their parents for a long time, it will not only affect the formation of children’s sense of security, the establishment of parent-child relationship, and lead to alienation between children and parents; more importantly, it will hinder communication skills and make communication with others difficult. 

One more thing that needs special attention is that once these negative effects appear, they are irreversible. 

Today’s topic: Are you close to your children?  In the third trimester, pregnant mothers have frequent leg cramps, except Calcium deficiency, there are often several “culprits” that need to be vigilant

Writer: Chen Fang

Editor: Liu Yizhi

Finalized: Su Zihou


Leg cramps in the third trimester of pregnancy are already a common phenomenon, most of them occur in the middle of the night. Although it will not cause great harm, it can really affect the sleep of pregnant women and may even bring some safety hazards— —

The pictures in this article are all from Internet, pictures and text are irrelevant

It is helpless to supplement calcium on time during the third trimester, and still have frequent cramps.

She has been cautious after getting pregnant late, especially after entering the third trimester, she learned about this In the stage, it is easy to bleed due to calcium deficiency and leg cramps, so adequate calcium should be added early. 

Strictly follow the doctor’s requirements for calcium supplementation. Sometimes the amount of food supplements is not enough, and some calcium tablets are taken as an aid. 

I thought that this would be foolproof, but in the third trimester, I still often have leg cramps at night. Not to mention the delay in sleep, it also makes people feel very irritable. 

Finally, my husband proposed to make it late I went to check it and the doctor told me that the frequent cramps were mainly caused by too much exercise during the day. 

Because the pregnant woman enters the third trimester, the belly is already quite big, the pressure on all aspects of the body will increase. If the pregnant mother does not pay attention to rest, walking or standing for too long every day will often cause Too much weight on the legs will naturally cause cramps. 

Several “culprits” that cause leg twitches

Many people think that calcium deficiency in the third trimester will cause leg twitches. This view is correct but not comprehensive, causing legs There are several reasons for convulsions——

1, low calcium

This is by far the most recognized “culprit” that causes leg cramps in pregnant women. 

Pregnant mothers themselves need calcium, and the development of the fetus will also absorb a large amount of calcium from the mother. Therefore, the intake of calcium in the third trimester of pregnancy must be 1200~1500 mg. 

Insufficient calcium intake will inevitably lead to more excitement of the nerves and muscles, which will lead to muscle contraction and cramps. In the absence of sun at night, calcium will be lower than during the day. Causes of cramps that occur at night. 

2 Overwork

Pregnant mother’s weight will gradually increase as the pregnancy time becomes longer, and the legs will need to bear more pressure. If the amount of exercise is too large, the leg muscles will be exhausted and the burden will also be Will increase accordingly, causing leg muscle cramps and cramps. 

3. Insufficient nutritional intake

Excessive intake of meat by pregnant mothers at one time is also one of the reasons for leg cramps, because meat is rich in protein and excessive It will affect the metabolism of carbohydrates in the body, resulting in accumulation of acidic metabolites and disorder of electrolytes, leading to cramps. 

4. Cold and cold


The temperature at night is relatively low. If you do not keep your legs warm or put your legs outside the quilt when you sleep, your calf muscles will get cold, and cramps will also occur under this stimulus. 

How to prevent

①A balanced diet

In terms of diet, in addition to supplementing sufficient calcium, you should also pay attention to the rationality of the diet. Don’t Ingest too much protein at one time, and drink some fresh orange juice or tomato juice in moderation every day, which can better prevent frequent leg cramps during pregnancy. 

②Don’t be too tired + sleep Pre-soaking the feet

Pregnant women in the third trimester of pregnancy have a heavy body, so they should not be overworked. Keep the calves and legs relaxed. You can also use hot water to soak your feet before going to bed to relax the leg muscles and maintain Warm legs can also prevent cramps. 

It should be noted that: pregnant women have special physique. It is recommended that the foot bath time should not be too long, 15-30 minutes is appropriate, and the water temperature of the foot bath should not be too high, preferably around 35-40 degrees. 

③Do some stretching exercises during pregnancy

Excessive exercise will indeed cause soreness in the legs, but if you start exercising at the beginning of pregnancy, your body will be able to withstand the amount of exercise more on the basis of exercise. Remember to be sure before exercise Stretch the body, and exercise should not be excessive. 

Knowledge extension: When cramps occur, how to deal with injury prevention

Pregnant women with cramps in the first trimester can easily cope with them by themselves, but in the third trimester, the pregnant women themselves bear more weight. Improper safety hazards can easily be buried, so correct handling must be adopted. 

The processing method is as follows:Return to Sohu to see more

When leg cramps occur, pregnant women should get out of bed with the help of their husbands, walk to the ground, and touch their heels on the ground. At this time, you can lie flat on the bed and press your heels against the wall, and it will be relieved in a short while; if the calf cannot be straightened, you can also bend the soles of your feet up to help straighten them. Then straighten your knees, and then carefully circle your ankles. This will reduce the cramps to a certain extent. Of course, if the cramps are more serious and these two methods cannot be relieved, you need to go to the hospital for treatment in time. 

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