What will happen to children who are often beaten and degraded by their parents in the future? A trauma may accompany a lifetime
Writer: Wang Xiaoming
Editor: Liu Yizhi
Finalized: Su Zi Later
Parents always hope to have the best children, but if the methods and methods are used in the wrong way, it is likely to have an impact on the life of the baby, and this just confirms the sentence “Happy people’s life is affected by childhood. Healing, unfortunate people need a lifetime to heal childhood.”
The pictures in this article are all from the Internet, and the pictures and texts are irrelevant
What will happen to children who are often beaten and degraded by their parents?
1. The brain becomes stupid
The American Pediatric Association found through research that parental suppression and depreciation can easily stimulate the child’s brain to secrete a lot of stress hormone levels, leading to certain changes in the brain structure , It may even affect the development of its intelligence.
2. Deterioration of personality
The Austrian psychologist found through research that if a child is often belittled and suppressed by parents, elders or teachers, it is easy to bury inferiority complex in his heart. .
This is because a person’s self-cognition in the initial stage comes from the evaluation of the closest person to himself, and for the child, the parents are the closest people, so they will give it to their parents The evaluation is convinced that if parents belittle and suppress their children, it will be easy for them to feel that they are poor, which will gradually develop an inferiority complex.
And the famous psychologist Jung once said that “the subconscious is destiny.” The words of parental suppression and depreciation will gradually enter the child’s subconscious, and drive the baby to continue in this direction, and eventually become a reality.
3. Psychologically prone to trauma.
Parents often suppress and devalue their children. It is easy to let the sense of security and trust established in the initial stage. After repeated such behaviors, slowly Being destroyed will change from the initial stage of suspicion to affirmation, and thus become disbelief, fear, far away from mom and dad, and protect oneself in this way.
This kind of residual psychological trauma can have a great impact on children, and may even accompany them throughout their lives.
Why parents have such a big influence on children ?
For children, parents are the first and most contacted people in this world. People often say that parents are their children’s first teachers for this reason. Not only will they be imitated by the children in their behavior and behavior, but also It will have an impact on the baby’s life.
Psychologist Jack Hodge once said that character determines destiny. The early character shaping has some intricate relationships with parents, partly from heredity, and partly from childhood energy.
The famous family therapist said that the influence of the parents of the original family on the children is likely to accompany them throughout their lives.
That is to say, what a person will become in the end, and his parents will have a great influence on him, and this influence will go deep into the bones and accompany the baby’s life.
Therefore, children’s living habits, personality, EQ, IQ, etc. are inseparable from their parents. If you want your baby to become smarter and have an online EQ, you need to pay more attention to your own words and deeds. manner.
Parents want Children’s double business online, these kinds of behaviors should not be done.
1. Stay up late with adults
When children are young, most of them will sleep with their parents, and their daily routines will follow their parents, but In fact, babies and toddlers sleep longer than adults.
Infants from 0 to 3 months need to sleep for at least 14 hours a day, and infants from 3 to 6 years old also need to have about 11 to 12 hours.
The University of London conducted a follow-up survey of more than 10,000 7-year-old children and found that if there is no fixed time to go to bed at night, or if they fall asleep later than 9 o’clock, the children’s scores in arithmetic, reading, etc. Poor.
This is mainly due to lack of sleep, which affects the children’s reading ability and intellectual development. At the same time, it also makes the baby feel excited and restless during the day, and it is easy to conflict with others.
In addition, the inability of children to have enough sleep during the growth and development stage will also affect their height and immunity.
2. Linguistic violence
A special institution has conducted a survey on language violence and found that about 90% of people said they had suffered language violence in childhood, and only 8.25% said that they had not suffered from language violence. The extreme words of the family.
Among 90% of people who suffer from language violence, 47.4% are due to mischief and bad grades when they were young, and 15.46% said their parents often beat and scold themselves.
And verbal violence is not limited to suppressive language such as ridicule and verbal abuse, but derogatory language such as accusations and curses in daily life is also a form of verbal violence, which is not conducive to the formation of a healthy personality for children. It is easy to distort the character of the baby, or even go to extremes.
3. Don’t let the child cry
When the child expresses grievance, sadness, or anger before he grows up, he will cry through crying, but it will cause some parents to be bored.
When they cry when they are young, parents will coax them patiently, and when they are a little older, they are often stopped. The way to prevent children from crying is to prevent them from venting their hearts. mood.
Long-term oppression can easily lead to the accumulation of some negative emotions, which may cause the baby to close herself up and unwilling to communicate with anyone. More and more women are unwilling to do premarital examinations , Someone who came over revealed his true thoughts and was a bit ignorant
Writer: Wang Xiaoming
Editor: Liu Yizhi
Finalized: Su Zihou
Marriage inspection is a marriage certificate for husband and wife The physical examination that needs to be done before is actually to check the physical fitness of both parties, for the sake of the quality of the marriage, and even for the sake of prenatal and postnatal care.
However, many women are unwilling to accept premarital examinations. In recent years, with the cancellation of mandatory premarital examinations, the rate of premarital examinations has plummeted. What is the reason for this?
Reasons why more and more women are unwilling to take premarital examinations
The following is the true thoughts of a person who came over, which makes people feel ignorant.
1. I think the premarital examination is unnecessary
According to the survey and research of the Health Bureau, 86.77 people accounted for 86.77%, 27% felt troublesome, and 13.75% felt it was not worth the money. .
From the data, it can be seen that most people feel that the premarital examination is unnecessary. The reason is that the premarital examination has been changed from mandatory to independent choice, and the later publicity is less intense, plus the current People have a physical examination every year, and they feel that a premarital examination is optional, and there is no need to spend time and money on this matter.
2. Worry about the privacy part being discovered by others
Now people’s minds have gradually opened up. Many people have tried love or cohabitation before marriage. Some women may have been cheated by others before marriage, leading to some accidents If something happened, then she would worry that the premarital examination would touch this part, and she didn’t want her future husband to know about such problems at all, so she would refuse the premarital examination.
3. I think it means distrust
Many people think that if two people choose to get married, they should trust each other. If they ask each other to do a premarital examination, it indicates distrust. Then this feeling of distrust may often affect feelings.
Therefore, in order to avoid the relationship between the two people, they will refuse to do the premarital examination. In fact, this is completely unnecessary. Actively cooperating with the inspection is responsible for yourself and your lover.
The figure in this article is the source network, figure The text is irrelevant
About premarital examinations in recent years
1. According to the statistics of the health department, after the mandatory premarital examination was cancelled in 2003, the rate of premarital examinations in 2004 was directly adjusted from 80% to 2.67%, and even zero in some areas.
2. According to survey statistics, the probability of problems detected during the premarital examination from 2000 to 2002 was 8.1%, 9.1%, and 9.29%, and it was directly changed to 2.67%, 2.93%, and 4.43 from 2004 to 2006. %.
However, the decline in the rate of premarital inspections has exposed a problem, that is, birth defects in babies. According to data, the number of people with birth defects in my country was 1.298 million in 2003, and 1.455 million in 2006. For 1.5323 million, there is an upward trend.
What can be checked by the pre-marital examination?
1. History of genetic disease
During the premarital examination, the doctor will ask whether both parties have a history of genetic disease, such as color blindness, intellectual disability, mental illness, heart disease, etc., and will also check liver function and infection through blood Diseases, etc., which leads to confusion in some private lives, or people with family medical history refuse the premarital examination, but the actual examination is only for prenatal and postnatal care.
2. Reproductive organ examination
Because of the open mind, some women who do not know how to protect themselves, steal the “forbidden fruit”, and finally can only choose abortion surgery.
According to the survey, 13 million women in my country undergo abortion operations each year, and 55.9% of them have repeated abortions.
Behind this data is not only harm to the uterus, but even induce infertility. Some women choose to refuse the premarital examination because they worry that this part of their problems will be discovered.
In fact, the premarital examination will only perform visual inspection of the female reproductive organs to see if there is a congenital absence of uterus or phimosis, etc., and further need to go to the hospital for professional examination.
Some experienced doctors can simply observe the condition of the endometrium and cervix to know if there is a history of pregnancy and miscarriage, but it will not appear on the premarital examination report.
3. Routine physical examination
The premarital examination will also conduct routine physical examinations of both parties, such as height, weight, urine routine, blood routine, blood sugar, blood pressure, etc., and also look at both parties In order to be close, there is blood relationship and so on.
Therefore, women do not need to be afraid to refuse the premarital examination. Participating in the premarital examination can help give birth to a healthy baby and make life happier in the future.