What is the difference between children who often “go out and wander around” and “stay at home” when they grow up on vacation?
Holiday is a term that every child can laugh at when they hear it, because it means to get out of the school’s “fetters”, and can do whatever they want with their own temperament every day, watching TV, Play games or play outside. It can be said that the holiday “buy” a lot of happy memories for the child’s childhood, however, some parents do not necessarily think so.
Ms. Li is a very serious In fact, her mother’s arrangements for the child’s holiday period had already been finalized. From morning to 8 o’clock in the evening, every minute and every second of the child’s life, Ms. Li made arrangements in advance. For example, she had to go to the cram school in the morning to make up lessons, and in the afternoon she had to do homework at home until dinner was over. .
Under such a strict family education atmosphere, children Even during the holiday, I didn’t make a day easy, and I could only live in a sea of all kinds of questions. However, after the child’s academic performance was released, Ms. Li’s excellent scores made Ms. Li more and more sure that her approach was not wrong, but the child’s reaction did not “think”.
Because of Ms. Li’s strict education, although the children have excellent grades, they do not seem to have their own personalities at all. The more and more puppet-like children also made Ms. Li slowly worry, because the growth of the child seemed to be different from what she had imagined.
In fact, Ms. Li’s method of education It’s not uncommon around us. It’s just a matter of controversy whether it is a good thing to sacrifice children’s entertainment time and let children concentrate on learning. So, parents may wish to know what are the obvious side effects if children often stay at home.
What are the negative effects of often “staying at home” on children?
Like Ms. Li’s child, because he was unable to go out and play at home for a long time, his character was always in a narrow space and could not be stretched out. For a long time, it will cause his personality to be unable to develop, and at the same time, the child’s physique will decline and become more vulnerable.
This is because children who play outside from time to time have the opportunity to be exposed to soil and air, and they are often active in the sun, so the children’s body will be better than those who are often at home.
However, parents can still deepen their freedom during vacation. What is the difference between “going out” and “at home” children when they grow up? Through this understanding, see if you want to let the child continue to stay at home.
What is the difference between “home stay” and “going out”?
1: Children at home have low social skills
Because of being in their own world for a long time, children at home cannot get in touch with the outside world, so naturally they have no chance to make new friends Then, in such an environment, they will become more introverted and shy, and their social skills will naturally be inferior to children who are often “wandering” outside.
Two: The children in the house are introverted and introverted Inferiority Yield
Because of the relationship of often staying at home, as mentioned above, there is naturally no extra social experience, and it is very likely that it will evolve into an introverted personality. You must know that introverted personality is very easy to give birth to inferiority complex. If a child cannot open his heart, he may eventually become a submissive inferiority child.
3: Children who go out “waves” have better health
Because of the relationship between running and playing outside, these children tend to have higher physiques and better bone development. Well, coupled with the fact that they are often exposed to soil, sand and outside air, their physique will become very strong.
We already know that people who stay at home and go out There are these differences, but parents still can’t let their children spend their time blindly on playing. Therefore, how should parents educate them to achieve a combination of work and rest? May as well deal with it this way.
How do parents combine work and rest?
1. Planning arrangement
Parents can prescribe a suitable plan for the child in advance, so that the child knows when to study and when to go out to play. In this way, the child will try his best to complete it in order to go out to play. task. But remember that don’t let the child complete the task hastily, and the parents themselves must also do a good job of inspection.
2, take children out to play more
Although children have space, parents can make themselves friends with children and take their children out to play if nothing happens. Through such an atmosphere, parents can educate their children while they are playing, so that both education and play are not missed.
3. Establish rules
Parents cannot stay with their children all the time, so it is necessary to make clear rules to let children know that they can only play up to a few points, or say they can’t. What dangerous place to play. In addition to the establishment of rules, the popularization of safety awareness must also be in place, so as to ensure the safety of children outside.
“I will help my daughter-in-law bring the baby, let her go to work”, the old man Kindly suggest that it was rejected by the son.
Who will bring the baby after the child is born is definitely a major event in a family. If the baby is taken by the elderly, young parents can work with peace of mind and reduce the financial pressure of the family. There are also disadvantages in bringing a baby to be pampered.
However, if there is no elderly person to bring the baby, it is necessary to hire a special person or the child’s mother to bring the baby full-time. This will inevitably increase the financial burden of the family. However, many families have made the best choice for them after weighing the pros and cons.
For example, Sakura is a typical full-time mother. From the birth of the child, it has been brought to the present. But when the child successfully entered the kindergarten, there was a wave of ups and downs in her life.
The 60-year-old mother-in-law offered to help bring the baby, and the son listened But she tactfully refuses
Sakura’s family is out of town and her mother-in-law’s family is a local. After Sakura became pregnant, she was in poor health, so she quit her job that often needed to travel and rest at home. After the baby was born, because the mother could not come to take care of her, the mother-in-law also said that she was in poor health, so Sakura discussed with her husband and became a full-time mother.
As soon as the child has reached the age of kindergarten, Sakura can be considered relaxed, but it is also because the child goes to kindergarten and the expenses increase, so Sakura has always wanted to go out to work.
Sakura’s husband is on duty today When I received a call from my mother, Sakura’s mother-in-law said: “I heard Sakura say that I always want to go out to work, or I will help my daughter-in-law with a baby in the future, so that she can go to work when she is fine!” His kind suggestion was rejected by his son. Later, after Sakura learned about this, she also felt that her husband’s actions were correct.
The 4 reasons for refusal given by the children are very real.
In fact, whenever the elderly help their children with their babies, it is out of good intentions, but it is reasonable to be rejected by the children because the reasons are too realistic. .
The arrival of the elderly will add extra expenses and troubles to the family
Some elderly people do not live in the same city with their children. If they help their children bring their children, they can only choose to come to the city where the children are located. Therefore, the arrival of the elderly needs enough accommodation space at home.
In addition, the elderly help to bring their children, and the children still have to bear the expenses of daily necessities, food, housing and transportation. In this way, although Bao’s mother can go out to work, it is still more in general. A lot of overhead and trouble.
It is easy to have conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in bringing a baby.
There will be more or less differences in the concept of parenting between the elderly and young parents. If it is a mother-daughter or a mother-child, some problems can be explained thoroughly. It was resolved.
But if you are a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it is easy to have conflicts due to poor communication and deepen the conflicts in getting along day and night.
The elderly are in poor health and their children usually have to devote more energy Taking care of multiple people is not a matter of having multiple pairs of chopsticks. The elderly have to work hard with their babies. Sometimes it is inevitable that a backache may catch a cold. At this time, children need extra time to take care of them.
So if an elderly person is helping to bring a baby, children should also consider these issues in advance, so as to avoid temporary embarrassment when the elderly are sick and need it.
After the child goes to kindergarten, simply picking up young parents to and from school is also competent
Under normal circumstances, after the child goes to kindergarten, the workload of caring for the child is significantly reduced, and it is simple to pick up the child to and from school. Young parents can still do the job, and there is no need for the elderly to toss and help.
It’s easy for the elderly to help with the baby, but parents must also Measure carefully
Of course, no matter how old the child is, it is easier for someone to help young parents with their baby. However, young parents must be carefully weighed.
From the perspective of the elderly, whether their physical condition, mood, physical strength, energy, etc. are suitable for bringing a baby.
From the perspective of children, will the elderly be spoiled with children and can they promote good living or study habits?
From the perspective of young parents, The time that a child needs the company of his parents the most is only a few years. If I miss it, I am afraid that I will feel sorry.
So on the whole, whether to ask the elderly to help bring the baby together is a question that requires young children to think carefully.
Written at the end: If there is no elderly to help the full-time mother with a baby, Bao’s father should also have more understanding and support, take the initiative to take the responsibility of bringing the baby, and give Bao’s mother an appropriate vacation. This is for family members In all, they are all profitable and harmless.