What is the difference between children who cry often and those who endure not crying when they grow up? Parents must be aware of it.
When children cry at every turn, parents are indeed very annoyed. However, parents use their own subjective judgments to determine whether the child should cry, but it will make the child very troubled, and may even be affected by the parent. Therefore, parents should know that letting the child endure crying is actually more harmful to the child than letting the child cry often.
Girlfriends are very concerned about their children Growing up, so she takes care of her child at home full-time, but although she demands high standards for herself, she also demands very high standards for her children. For example, when the child usually cries, she can’t cry for too long, otherwise she will be angry.
The reason she did this is that children should be more masculine. If they cry often, it will cause them to become weak, or they like to cry to avoid problems, which is not positive for children’s growth. influences.
It’s a good starting point for a girlfriend to do this, but it puts a lot of pressure on the child. Now, although the child doesn’t like to cry, he has a sense of distance from the girlfriend. Sometimes it feels like a belt. The child’s, not the child’s mother.
Parents who have the practice of girlfriends are not counted However, ignoring children’s emotions and insisting on their own education can make children meet their own requirements and become obedient children, but the long-term impact on children is very negative. Therefore, parents should know the difference between children who cry often and those who endure not crying when they grow up, and they must know the difference.
What is the difference between children who cry often and those who endure not crying when they grow up?
1: The difference between psychological tolerance
In fact, crying is a way of emotional venting. If parents pay too much attention to the child’s external performance and ignore the child’s inner emotions, it is very likely because the child The heart is blocked and lacks channels for catharsis, which eventually leads to a lower and lower psychological endurance of the child and becomes fragile.
Two: the empathy ability is different
If parents often tell their children not to cry, it is equivalent to actively stopping their children’s ability to process emotions. If there is a problem with a child’s emotional management ability, the child’s ability to perceive emotions will also be biased. The result of this is that children cannot empathize with others’ experiences, and even become indifferent and indifferent.
3: Psychological problems
As mentioned above, crying is a way to vent emotions. If the child cannot express his emotions by crying, then the child’s heart There will be problems due to lack of guidance. For example, symptoms such as autism, depression, or anxiety are all caused by children’s long-term holding of emotions in their hearts. Therefore, parents should be aware of and correct them in time.
It can be seen that the child crying is not A bad thing, as long as parents guide their children to cry in a correct and reasonable way, then crying will not only make the child weaker, but will also make the child stronger and stronger, and become a person who can face big winds and waves.
How can parents correctly solve the problem of children’s love to cry?
First of all, we must understand the reasons for crying
Why children like to cry, parents should deeply understand the reasons for children crying, sometimes the reason for children crying may be because they are not accompanied by themselves, or there are other reasons Regarding grievances, parents should not arbitrarily think that this is a manifestation of the child’s vulnerability.
Parents need to communicate and understand with their children, and then understand why the child is crying through a patient and gentle tone. The tone must be restrained during the understanding process. If there is a tendency to be impatient or angry, the child will not Dare to show the parents why they cry, and even dare not communicate with the parents anymore.
After that, give encouragement and hugs
After understanding why the child is crying, parents can give encouragement and warm hugs. This will let the child know that he is not alone and that his parents are willing to accompany him and give help and hugs.
Through the warmth of speech and body, the child’s sense of security can be satisfied, and he will not become confused because of the vacancy, and it can also reduce the number of crying. Because for children, there is no backing stronger than the embrace and encouragement of their parents.
Finally, set an example for your children
Parents should keep their children away from the image of crying ghosts by “resolving”, rather than making their children refrain from crying through their own compulsory requirements. In other words, parents can set a strong and courageous example for their children, and let them learn from such little heroes. Children can also learn tenacity and courage instead of crying.
For example, some heroes or cartoon characters have traits such as courage and strength, and these traits can not only lead children to become better people, but also help them overcome bad habits. .
The daily life of the “bear child” is neither evil nor unhappy. Netizens: just owe Cleaned up
Children are more naughty, but some children are very cute, and some children are respected. Especially for those disobedient and uneducated children, there is a word on the Internet to specifically describe such children, that is, “bear children.”
“Bear children” are not uncommon in life. They run and bark in public and see small animals going forward to bully. They have no sense of rules at all.
Many “bear kids” also enjoy making fun of others and sabotage. In fact, there are “bear children” because of the “bear parents” behind them.
There are many complaints about “bear children” on the Internet. A netizen who likes to raise succulents has a relative’s child at home. This child is very interested in those beautiful succulents. I lost a lot of leaves, and I used a small shovel to dig out the plants from the pots.
Netizens see their I was very angry at this insult, so I criticized the child for a few words. I didn’t expect the child’s mother to protect her shortcomings. She also said: “Isn’t it just a few broken flowers? How much money will be with you.”
The bear child encountered by a netizen was even more extreme. During a family gathering, the netizen sat on the sofa and chatted with his cousin. The cousin was already pregnant.
A relative’s child is about 9 years old, and he suddenly pushed his cousin from behind and almost pushed the pregnant cousin off the sofa.
Ask him why he did this, “Bear Child” even said that he was very curious about whether a pregnant woman would have a miscarriage if she fell, because it was played like this on TV.
For the evil behaviors of many “bear children”, netizens are also verbal and penalized. Many people believe that the reason why these “bear children” are so rampant is because they have not cleaned up. If their parents can stand up in time for discipline, these children would not dare to be so excessive.
Why are there “bear children”
1 Parents’ dereliction of duty
In order to earn money and work, many young couples have little time to accompany and educate their children. Some simply leave their children to the care of the elderly.
The elderly are very spoiled for their grandchildren, and some even think that it is a good thing for children to be naughty.
Children’s cognition is limited, and they have not formed a correct view of right and wrong, so they start to do whatever they want, which creates a group of “bear kids” who are unconcerned.
2, the wrong way of education
Some parents dote on their children very much and think that as long as their children are happy, they will not criticize education even if they make mistakes. This makes many children very selfish, thinking only for themselves and not taking into account the feelings of others. When a child makes a mistake, the parent’s inaction is to condone evil behavior.
Some parents see their children making mistakes, they will only use beaten, scolding and verbose methods to treat their children, thinking that they can manage their children well.
Actually, brutal beating and scolding will not work at all. Children will only learn violence and indifference from their parents, and they will also develop a strong rebellious psychology, which will intensify the evil behavior.
So behind the “bear children”, there are generally incompetent parents. If you want to change the “bear child”, you must start with the parents. Only when the parents change their own education methods and truly take responsibility for the child’s growth, will the child “change evil and return to the right.”
How should parents educate “bear children”
1 , Parents can’t be absent
As the saying goes, “It’s the father’s fault” if you just give birth to a child without taking up the responsibility of parenting, you are an unqualified parent.
Parents play a demonstrative and leading role in the growth of their children. If they want their children to develop physically and mentally, parents must accompany their children from an early age and establish a good parent-child relationship with their children.
2, understand the child’s growth pattern
Parents must really understand their children, understand their true thoughts, and understand their children’s growth laws in order to educate their children well.
Don’t always judge children from the perspective of adults. Many bad behaviors in the eyes of adults are actually normal phenomena in the growth of children.
For example, children love to play with mud and always stain their clothes. In fact, children are feeling the texture of the fusion of soil and water, so parents should not always criticize harshly and blindly prevent children from exploring. Instead, they should be guided reasonably so that children learn to care for the environment and save water while playing.
3. Let children learn to take responsibility
If the child really made a mistake, the parents shouldn’t make too much accusation and criticism, let alone yelling or hitting the child. If you want your child to correct the mistake, let them experience the consequences of the mistake.
For example, a little boy pressed down all the floors in the elevator, which wasted everyone’s time, and the boy’s mother took the boy to apologize to others until the last person walked off the elevator. Only when children bear the consequences of their actions will they take the initiative to abide by the rules.
To prevent a child from becoming a “bear child”, parents must first be good parents. The child is just a copy of the parent. Only when the original is good enough can the child be born.