The mother-in-law refused to give birth, but the mother-in-law refused to go along. After giving the reason, the netizens were angry and asked her to give birth.
Presumably everyone knows that once a woman gives birth to a child, it is equivalent to going to a ghost gate. Especially in the normal delivery, the parturient not only has to suffer the pain of breaking 10 ribs at the same time.
If the fetus is too well developed, overweight, or the fetal position is not correct, it is likely to cause dystocia, and it is necessary to switch to a cesarean section to ensure the safety of the mother and fetus.
In addition to physical pain, if the husband and family members do not understand, the psychological pain will be a severe blow to the mother.
However, her mother-in-law refused to follow her, and after giving the reason, the netizens were angry and let her go to give birth!
Previously, there was a dystocia on the Internet that required a cesarean section, and the real incident that the husband and mother-in-law strongly opposed attracted many netizens.
Because Xiaowen, the parturient woman in the incident, had reached 38 years of age, and when she gave birth to her eldest daughter, both her mother-in-law and her husband had a patriarchal mindset. With good care, the physique becomes worse.
So this time when Xiaowen gave birth to a second child, she had no strength at the beginning of the labor process, which meant that it was impossible to have a smooth delivery, and a cesarean section should be performed as soon as possible, otherwise Xiaowen and the fetus would be in danger.
While preparing for Xiaowen’s caesarean section, the doctor asked Xiaowen’s husband to sign the operation consent form.
However, Xiaowen’s husband has not signed the name for a long time. When Xiaowen’s mother-in-law heard that the doctor was about to perform a caesarean section for Xiaowen, she immediately raised an objection and warned the doctor not to give Xiaowen. Do a caesarean section.
Xiaowen’s husband went straight back to “other people have to go through these dangers when they have children. If she is not a son, she will have to wait for a C-section for several years!”
The mother-in-law also said loudly, I’m 38 years old, who knows if I can give birth afterwards! Our family is going to have grandchildren!”
Fortunately, Xiaowen’s parents arrived in time, and her husband and mother-in-law didn’t continue. Hustle and bustle.
Xiaowen was able to operate smoothly and gave birth to a boy through caesarean section. However, when Xiaowen woke up, she filed for divorce with her husband as soon as possible.
At the moment of her life and death, she saw her husband’s true face clearly and was completely disappointed.
After understanding the whole process, netizens severely criticized Xiaowen’s husband and mother-in-law. Many netizens felt that the mother-in-law herself was a woman and gave birth to children, so they couldn’t understand the pain of their daughter-in-law. , Directly leave a message saying “Let her give birth!”
It can be seen from Xiaowen’s experience that when giving birth, if her husband and in-laws have the following behaviors, it can be said that she did not marry the right person. It is a good idea to plan as soon as possible.
1. Because of the patriarchal thinking, we are determined not to give birth by caesarean section
Presumably everyone knows that after a caesarean section, it takes 2 to 3 years of rest before reconsidering the matter of giving birth again.
This is also the reason why many husbands or in-laws who have a patriarchal mindset disagree with their mothers receiving a C-section.
If you disregard the comfort of the mother because of such feudal and outdated thinking, you will have to re-examine your marriage.
2, because of the cost, I do not agree to perform a C-section
The cost of a C-section is usually several times higher than the cost of a normal childbirth, which makes some husbands and husbands who are more stingy and distressed about the cost of the operation. Willing to allow the parturient to have a cesarean section.
Even if you know that if you don’t have a caesarean section in time, you will not only have to endure pain, but it will also endanger your life.
In the face of life and money, I chose money. Such partners and family members still carefully consider whether to continue to be with them and leave their life and death to their decision.
3. Seeing that they are giving birth to a daughter, they are indifferent.
The patriarchal ideology makes women a childbirth tool. When they see that their husbands and in-laws know that they have given birth to a daughter, they will ignore them, and if they are indifferent, the mothers will have to seriously consider their future lives.
The process of giving birth is full of dangers and unknowns. Pregnant mothers should understand the attitudes of their husbands and in-laws to caesarean section in advance, and prepare early.
When giving birth, it is best to be accompanied by your mother’s family and relatives who can focus on the health of the pregnant mother. Don’t cause irreparable tragedies because of the obstruction of your husband and in-laws.
Of course, in order to avoid having to switch to a caesarean section in the middle of a normal delivery, I put myself in a more dangerous situation.
Pregnant mothers should pay attention to the following points during pregnancy
1. Active birth checkup
Through birth checkup, you can better and more timely understand the physical condition of the pregnant mother and the development of the fetus, so that the doctor can estimate the most suitable The production method, prepare well in advance.
2. Don’t be too nervous during the delivery process.
Many parturients will have a certain impact on contractions due to too much stress during the delivery process, which will eventually adversely affect the normal delivery.
So, pregnant mothers must believe in today’s medical technology, stay calm, follow the doctor’s instructions, and successfully complete the delivery.
3. Don’t take too much supplementation during pregnancy
Many pregnant mothers eat too much supplementation during pregnancy, which causes the fetus to be too large, which is not conducive to the smooth delivery.
It is worth noting that during pregnancy, pregnant mothers should pay attention to maintaining an appropriate amount of exercise to strengthen their physical fitness while also increasing their physical strength to cope with the physical exertion of normal delivery.
In order to be able to give birth in the best state, pregnant mothers should take an active part in the birth check. Whether it is nutritional supplementation or delivery by normal delivery or caesarean section, they must follow the doctor’s instructions. Everything is safe and smooth. Mainly complete production.
The process of giving birth is also a process of testing the humanity of partners and relatives. Pregnant mothers may wish to keep their eyes open and get to know their true colors! At the same time, we must protect our own safety and be prepared in advance to deal with emergencies in the production process!
When you gave birth, what was the attitude of your husband and in-laws? Welcome to leave a message to share! When a child is isolated by a partner, it is not advisable for the parent to enforce it. The ICPS method is the kingly way.
The child’s relationship is pure and beautiful, but when it breaks, it is also very direct. The inherent goodness of human nature and the inherent evil side of human nature are on the child. They are all reflected incisively and vividly.
When children are playing well, it is common for children to play games together. If they don’t play well, they are isolated from each other and ignored each other. These are common things.
But a bad collective environment and atmosphere will very much affect the children’s own mental health. Parents don’t want their children to encounter situations where they cannot integrate into the group and are isolated by the same class. If it happens, how should parents respond?
Ms. Liu from Sichuan found that her child was often depressed when she went home. She checked the child’s body and showed no injuries. It can be seen that the child did not fight with other children.
But the child is unhappy when he comes back every day, his face is solemn. Ms. Liu looked in her eyes, and was anxious. The child also asked Ms. Liu’s mother if other people didn’t like me. Ms. Liu also found that her friends who used to go to school with the child no longer appeared downstairs, so this lady probably guessed something.
After some euphemistic inquiry, Ms. Liu did not expect that her child encountered the isolation of his peers. What should Ms. Liu do? How can we help the child? Ms. Liu asked the child’s aunt. The child’s aunt is an experienced teacher. My aunt lived up to Ms. Liu’s expectations and provided Ms. Liu with the ICPS method.
What is the ICPS method?
ICPS method parents help children learn how to get along with others and help children resolve conflicts with peers. The ICPS method consists of 4 plates, and the 4 plates interact to help children grow and increase their skills in getting along with others. The ICPS method is most useful when children have conflicts in interpersonal communication.
The ICPS method helps children find problems for attribution, encourages children to empathize with problems, encourages children to think of ways and turn them into realistic actions, so as to achieve the purpose of helping children grow up.
How to do the ICPS method?
1. Let children find the problem.
To solve the problem, we must first understand the problem, understand where the problem is, and understand which part of the communication process has the problem. Parents must first encourage their children to think about problems, to think about the experience in the process of getting along, and to think about the outbreak of conflict between the child and other small partners.
And we must follow the temptation, gently guide the child to think, instead of forcing the child to think, so that the child will feel that their parents are terrifying. Sometimes when a child is unwilling to recall painful memories, parents should stop forcing the child to remember, and let the child look for problems when the child thinks about it.
2. Let children think from the perspective of both parties
It is selfish to think blindly from one’s own starting point, but it is too selfless to think only from the starting point of others. Parents should help their children so that they can learn to think about their own feelings from their own starting point, and they can also think about other people’s feelings from the starting point of others.
When children are still in childhood, they should be encouraged to think about themselves, and don’t let the children develop a pleasing personality. More often, parents should take care of and understand the children instead of favoring others. .
Parents can appropriately stand in their children’s perspective and help children think, but encourage their children to think about others, so that they can let the children know that their parents are on their side, and let them Children learn to think in both directions from the perspective of others and their own.
3. Help your children come up with countermeasures
If you have found the problem and understood the problem from both sides, then you must come up with countermeasures to solve the problem in a targeted manner.
This process is actually not easy, because the parents do not understand how the child will solve the problem. Many parents don’t know their children so well, and don’t know how their children will resolve conflicts in their interpersonal relationships. This is the best time for parents to understand their children.
Parents can observe their children’s thoughts, the perspective of their thinking, and help children come up with a good strategy. Parents shouldn’t interfere too much with their children at this time. Adults must solve problems differently from children. Children have their own ways of apologizing and expressing apologies, as well as their own ways of resolving conflicts. Parents only need to assist their children, and don’t be the leader in solving problems for the children, and don’t interfere with the children too much.
4. Think about the practicality of the countermeasures
Let the children think about whether their ideas can become a reality and what consequences their ideas might bring. What kind of emergencies can the child solve? Children sometimes don’t understand the reality so well, and the reality is changeable and complicated. The child thinks about real problems, and thinks about whether his own countermeasures are useful in real life. This can also help your child become more than just a person who can talk about things on paper in the future.
The best way is for children to communicate with their peers. The children are isolated. Parents should not interfere too much. It is the best way to help children solve the problems and help them not be incapable of dealing with this situation in the future.