The more you care about the child, the more rebellious? Let’s try the fish tank law: let children know how to indulge, and the effect will be better.
Nowadays, more and more parents feel that their children are difficult to discipline. Whether they are preaching or violent with sticks, children seem to be too salty. Do not enter, do not eat soft or hard.
Every time I say that the child is going to the west, even if I say one more sentence, the child will be disgusted. Why the more you care about your children, the less obedient your children are? This has become a problem that plagues many parents.
“You must not speak during class and listen to the teacher carefully”
“Don’t talk after school Stay outside and go home quickly”, “Hurry up to do your homework after eating, don’t have other ideas”
I believe that every parent has said something like this, but maybe no parent has thought of being like a Tang monk, chatting in the children’s ears, children Will they be disgusted? After all, they will also have their own emotions.
Some people call this kind of discipline “fish tank discipline”. At this time, it involves a psychological term called fish tank law. If you want to discipline your children correctly, you must first understand what is fish tank discipline. .
What is the law of fish tanks
at the headquarters of a company in the United States There is a particularly beautiful fish tank at the gate of the city. There are more than a dozen lovely tropical fish in the fish tank, which can always attract the attention of people who come and go. It’s just that these fish have lived here for more than two years, but they haven’t grown up at all, which makes people feel quite strange.
Once the chairman’s son came to the company to look for his father to play, and accidentally broke the fish tank. Since the fish tanks are custom-made, these tropical fishes can only be temporarily kept in the fountain at the door of the company, and only when the new fish tanks arrive can they return to their small homes.
Two months later, the customized fish tank was finally shipped back to the company. When people salvaged these tropical fish from the fountain and put them in the fish tank, they were surprised to find that the tropical fish had not grown up before. Suddenly It grows from three inches to one foot.
At this time, everyone suddenly understood that the reason Tropical fish have never grown up because the fish tank limits their growth. In the vast expanse of the fountain, tropical fish can grow freely and have such big changes because they are not subject to various restrictions.
The same is true for the relationship between parents and children. If parents always restrict their children too much, it is likely to restrict the children’s free development, which will naturally lead to their slow growth.
What impact does fish tank discipline have on children?
1. Cause children to lose themselves
The meaning of fish tanks to children is completely different from that to parents. Parents have many requirements for children in the name of being good for their children. They do not Allow children to do this, and not allow them to do that. I only hope that children will move forward strictly according to their own plans for them.
In this growing environment, any child’s own ideas will be denied by their parents. Over time, they will become accustomed to being arranged by their parents, and thus have a strong dependence on their parents, leading to a gradual loss of themselves and becoming a puppet with no own ideas.
2, causing children to lose their ability to take care of themselves
Although the fish tank is a restriction to the growth of a child, in the eyes of some parents it is a protection for the child. They habitually imprison the children in the fish tank, depriving them of all the right to try to explore, resulting in the children not having any mobile phone skills.
When children cannot truly participate in life, their ability to take care of themselves will drop drastically, or even almost zero. Once children develop the habit of relying on their parents, they will inevitably not be independent, and naturally they will not be able to adapt to society independently.
How should parents break the fish tank to help their children grow?
1. Learn to respect children
Parents should give their children the right to speak, instead of rejecting their children to express their inner thoughts. Because children’s self-awareness will develop rapidly after the age of two, and as they grow older, they also have their own views on many things. However, many parents deliberately or unintentionally ignore their children’s thoughts and naturally arrange their children’s lives.
Such an approach is obviously very arbitrary, and it is naturally unacceptable for children. When their interests and hobbies cannot be understood and supported by their parents, the children will naturally feel resentful. The disrespect of parents may cause children to become more and more rebellious. Only by learning to respect children can children grow up.
2, learn to let go
As children grow up, they need to have their own space. Parents must learn to let go appropriately, exit the children’s world, and let the children make their own choices in their lives. Of course, this does not mean that parents completely withdraw from their children’s lives, but to allow children to have certain choices under the premise of grasping the general direction of their children’s development.
Of course, sometimes children need to pay a certain price for their choice, but this is precisely the inevitable experience during their growth. It is believed that these will become the most precious wealth in children’s lives, allowing them to have better development in the future. There are 3 weeks of pregnancy, which is a critical period for fetal brain development. It can be called “the starting line of intelligence”
Every pregnant mother hopes that the fetus in her belly will be smarter after birth, except for genetic factors. Influence, what the pregnant mother does during pregnancy is also particularly important, because some things will affect the brain development process of Feibao. There are 3 weeks of pregnancy, which is a critical period for fetal brain development. Mothers-to-be can catch it once, and the baby can win at the starting line of “intelligence”.
How many do you grasp during these 3 weeks of baby’s brain development during pregnancy?
Key moment one: 5 weeks of pregnancy
From a physiological point of view, the brain begins to develop around 5 weeks after the fetus is in the belly of a pregnant woman. At this time, cells divide at a high speed, and the brain gradually forms basic network nerves. This is a critical period of intellectual development. Pregnant mothers need to supplement enough nutrients to meet the fetus’s brain development needs.
But in this stage, many pregnant mothers Ignore this point. Some people think that the brain of the fetus has not started to develop at this time, and some pregnant mothers even dare not eat more, for fear that they will lose shape after gaining weight and become stupid and ugly, so they choose to control their diet all the time. , Do not eat food that is easy to get blessed, but such an idea is ridiculous. The correct approach is to eat more nutritious foods, always pay attention to a balanced diet, and always pay attention to nutritional collocation to lay a solid foundation for fetal development.
Key moment two: 10 weeks of pregnancy
When the pregnant mother is 10 weeks pregnant, the brain development enters the intermediate stage of development. At this time, the fetal brain cells are gradually perfected and become active, and the earliest cerebral cortex development process also begins to accelerate. The cerebral cortex plays a very important role. It mainly controls human memory and information processing. Therefore, pregnant mothers need to pay special attention to it.
Pregnant mothers should add more moisture at this time Get more nutrition, protect the nutritional needs of brain cells, and develop the good habit of drinking more water and eating more protein. These are very helpful to the growth and development of your baby. Only in this way can children become smarter.
Key moment three: 20 weeks of pregnancy
The 20th week of pregnancy is the last critical period of fetal brain development. At this time, the baby’s many sensory systems have been gradually improved, and the fetus has hearing, taste and smell. During this period, because the fetal brain system is basically perfect, the limbs will begin to develop, but even so, you still can’t relax your attention to the “brain”. Don’t miss the best of your baby because of your ignorance and carelessness. During the growth period, it is possible to achieve the ultimate goal of having a smart baby.
At this time, pregnant mothers should develop well Work rest and eating habits, eat a reasonable diet, take in adequate nutrition, quit smoking and alcohol; allow enough time to rest; develop the habit of taking a nap and prohibit staying up late; eat more fruits and vegetables, and avoid excessive intake of big fish and meat, these are all It has great side effects on the growth and development of the fetus. In the last stage of brain development, don’t have the phenomenon of “lack of stamina”, as this will have a bad impact on the fetus’s IQ.
If you are pregnant, you must remember In these three key periods, we can start with diet or prenatal education, and make efforts to improve the baby’s intelligence. Don’t ignore it, otherwise it will be difficult to achieve the ultimate goal of having a “smart baby”, and you will regret it in the end. Finally, help mothers hope that every pregnant mother can welcome your healthy and smart baby.