The boy was eating hot pot on the train, and his father’s behavior was praised. The best education is the parents
The American author Jenny Allim, who has published many well-respected parenting books, once said ” The shortcomings that appear in children are not the most terrible. The most terrifying is that the parents who lead the children lack the correct educational concept and family education for their children, and at the same time they have set an example for their children full of shortcomings.”
Previously, during the Spring Festival The interactive short video of a pair of father and son on the train attracted many netizens’ likes. In the video, the little boy who seems to be only 5 or 6 years old, because he is hungry, keeps talking about eating the self-heating small hot pot that he bought just before getting on the train.
But even in an ordinary green-skinned train, the smell of self-heating hot pot will surely fill the entire carriage, not to mention that it hasn’t arrived at the meal, the smell will undoubtedly affect other passengers.
The little boy’s father had obviously taken this into consideration, so he patiently persuaded the little boy to wait another hour before eating when it was time.
If you are really hungry, you can eat some biscuits. But the little boy didn’t agree with his father’s suggestion, and there was a tendency to cry loudly.
Seeing that the persuasion was ineffective, Dad took the little boy to a ventilated place between the carriages of the train. He also deliberately spread the newspapers he bought before getting on the train on the ground and let the little boy sit on the newspaper to eat.
When the little boy finished eating, he folded the newspaper and threw it into the trash can along with the box of the small hot pot.
One of the highlights is that when the little boy ate, his father also explained to him why he came here to eat. After eating, he had to pack the newspapers and lunch boxes and get the designated ones. Throw away the trash can.
Thomas Arnold, a world-renowned educator, said a sentence that is very suitable for commenting on this father’s actions.
That is, “The words and deeds of parents are the best and most vivid teachers for children. Under constant repetition and subtle changes, children can fully learn the advantages and disadvantages of their parents. Therefore, as parents, you should let Become the most correct and good role model for your children!”
What kind of bad words and deeds of parents will have a direct negative impact on their children?
1. Bring bad emotions to getting along with their children
Parents, as adults, have to face various social and work problems and pressures every day, and it is easy to produce bad emotions. It’s a normal thing.
However, some parents bring these negative emotions to their children and make their children a tool for venting their negative emotions. Such actions will undoubtedly cause psychological trauma to their children and affect their physical and mental health.
No matter what kind of grievances encountered on the outside, the heart is full of negative energy, but when returning home to face innocent children, parents should try to be calm and manage their emotions well. Only in this way can we set a good example for children to manage their emotions freely.
2. Be impulsive and like to use force to solve problems.
Research shows that children with violent personality, at least one of their parents is impulsive, impatient, and likes to use force to solve problems.
For children who like to use violence to control violence and are impulsive and irritable, they can easily do things to hurt themselves or others.
Therefore, parents should establish for their children an image of being calm and calm in the face of things, and being good at solving problems with their brains, so that the children will behave in a different way.
3. Speaking vulgarly or like to say some swear words
Children begin to have strong curiosity and imitating ability from 2 to 3 years old. If parents often say swear words or vulgar words in front of their children, the children can easily learn them.
Once a child takes these impolite ways of speaking as a habit, it will take a lot of time and energy to correct it in the future.
Albert Bandura, a well-known Canadian psychologist, has discovered after long-term research that children will eventually learn various skills and habits through observation, listening and other ways, after imitating. Parents or people who get along with their children for a long time are the children’s favorite and most direct imitators.
In order to allow Children learn the best words and deeds and become excellent people. Parents should pay attention to the following points when they get along with their children.
1. Be strict with yourself
“The upper beam is not correct and the lower beam is crooked” , “Up and down effect”, these ideals must be known to parents.
So, in front of the children, parents must be strict with themselves and do not expose their bad habits to the children from time to time, so as not to affect the children in a subtle way.
2. Respect children
As an independent existence, children naturally have the right to be respected. If parents are only buying snacks and toys before making decisions for their children, they can fully consider their children’s opinions.
Let children always feel that they are respected. Such intuitive education can help children learn to respect themselves and others.
Respect the children and listen patiently to their thoughts. If parents do this, the parent-child relationship will become closer, and the children are more willing to open their hearts to their parents and accept their parents’ education.
Thinker and philosopher Tolstoy once stated that “When parents educate their children, they are essentially self-education. And parents who can maintain good words and deeds are the best education for their children. .”
Rather than telling their children some great truths all day long, parents can’t do it at all. This kind of education is likely to have unsatisfactory results. If parents can practice by themselves and make the best example, children can receive the most vivid and effective education!
Do you usually deliberately restrain your words and deeds in front of your children? Welcome to leave a message to share your stories and opinions! A family of 3 lives on 10 square meters, but the family has a collection of more than 10,000 books. The child is raised as a “rich second generation”.
Nowadays, the house price in big cities is tens of thousands, even if one person does not eat for a year You can only buy one or two flats if you drink, so living in a big house is an unattainable dream for many wage earners in first- and second-tier cities.
Without a big house, the quality of life is naturally difficult to improve qualitatively, but people who pay attention to spiritual cultivation can make themselves happy from another dimension.
There is a young couple in Beijing. They took their son and lived in a ten-square-meter home, and they lived there for many years. In the eyes of ordinary people, such a cramped living space should be difficult for people to live happily, but this family of three live happily, because they are more inclined to spiritual pursuits than material things. In a small home, The book collection alone is over 10,000.
Walking into this small family, you can see that almost all the space is filled, even the beds are double-decked, the couple sleeps on the lower bunk, the son sleeps on the upper bunk, and the kitchen is small. Even the range hood can’t fit, so I use a small electric fan to do it when cooking.
But it is such a tightly spaced home, but almost every corner is filled with books. According to the hostess of this house, she, the child’s father, and the child themselves all love to read books. , So there is no TV at home. Every night, a family of three will hold a book and read it for a long time.
Because of this way of life, young children are very knowledgeable in conversation, as if they come from a scholarly family, it is difficult to believe that they are children of an ordinary family. During the interview, the mother was also very proud of her son, and even joked that although her family was poor, her son was raised into a “rich second generation.”
In this world, some people pursue material wealth, while others pursue spiritual realm. This pair of three snails living in a small space of ten square meters is typical of the latter. As outsiders, it is difficult for us to understand their state of mind, but there is no doubt that they are very happy today.
No money can make children happy. Parents’ education is the most important.
Children’s material needs are very limited
For children, material is far It is not as important to adults, because what they care most about is not money, but the company of their parents.
So in terms of material, parents only need to maintain ordinary supplies and continue to increase investment, which will bring extremely limited happiness to their children. Conversely, more high-quality parent-child companionship can double the happiness of children.
Through precepts and deeds, let children be drunk in more valuable things
If the material conditions at home are not very good, then parents should find ways to dilute the impact of money on children, such as Like the young couple in the above case, let the children like to read books.
Once children are immersed in books, they will naturally pursue higher-level pursuits, and they will not care about the temporary lack of material. Of course, this is inseparable from the correct education and guidance of the parents. If the parents do not like to read, they force their children to read, the effect is probably not good.
We all know that the Jews are an excellent nation, but how many people know that this ethnic group is crazy about reading. From the genetic level, all races are equal, and there is no distinction between superior and inferior. Only acquired education is the root cause of the ethnic gap. So it’s okay to be poor, but family education must not be left behind. Only in this way can the child’s future be more promising.
True affluence is actually on the spiritual level.
Wealthy is not rich, but spiritually rich is really rich.
Children of rich people May not become a talent, Li Shuangjiang’s son Li Tianyi is an excellent example. This also fully shows that the real affluence does not lie in the material, but on the spiritual level. No matter how rich parents provide their children, they can’t compare to high-quality parent-child companionship and high-quality spiritual guidance. Only when they are rich in spirit can they be truly rich.
A positive attitude helps children to “kill monsters and upgrade” all the way.
Children’s growth is actually equivalent to monsters upgrade. Every age, they will meet Problems that should be encountered at his age. Whether or not these problems can be solved perfectly depends on what conditions his parents have given him. Of course, it is not a material condition, but other conditions such as ability, personality, and quality.
Among the many qualities, a positive attitude is the most important. With it, children can overcome obstacles along the way, and they will have the confidence to face no matter how difficult they are, instead of Shy away.
As parents, we are obligated to provide more abundant material protection for our children. But on the other hand, everyone has to face the reality. If you need to spend a lot of effort to increase a little bit of protection on the material level, it is better to put five points into the child’s spiritual world.
Through this “sword to the side” method, you can double the output, and your child will also have a happier and happier childhood than other children. Not only that, his future path will also be smoother.