Many parents often say a few words that most dampen children’s self-confidence. How many have you said?
Parents should pay attention to the methods and methods when educating their children. It is possible that a word or action you accidentally destroys the child’s self-confidence.
Writer: Wang Xiaoming
Editor: Liu Yizhi
Finalized: Su After the son
There is a Chinese saying that “a filial son is born under a stick”. If a child makes a mistake, most parents will severely criticize or give a sigh of relief, but sometimes they don’t have a good grasp of the degree. Cause a certain amount of harm to the child’s young mind.
All the pictures in this article are from the network, and the pictures and texts are irrelevant
When Xiaozhi’s parents chose to divorce for some reasons when he was 5 years old, the child was sentenced to his mother.
The breakdown of the marriage changed the temperament of the mother who was originally gentle and watery, and she treated her son Xiaozhi even more severely–
In one test, Xiaozhi won the second place. He happily ran home to share the good news with his mother, but he did not expect to be criticized. “I took the second place in the class. What’s so happy? Look at the daughter of the aunt next door, who took the whole grade. First, you look at you again”.
After listening to what his mother said, Xiaozhi was aggrieved. This was the best time he had done in the exam. Why would he still be scolded…
During the winter vacation, Xiaozhi was always there. I eat, do homework, and play in the room, and I don’t want to listen to my mother’s nagging.
But after a week of this, my mother began to say: “Why do you behave like your lazy father…”
Similar to hurting words, Xiaozhi can’t count whether he has heard it. How many times, when it was serious, my mother said directly, “The last thing I regret is that I gave birth to you. If it weren’t for you, could I live like this?”
Under the circumstances, Xiaozhi became extremely inferior. Even if he participated in the work, he was only conscientious and couldn’t do great things at all.
When a child does something wrong, if the parent’s scolding and criticism do not grasp the degree, it is likely to become a kind of poison, which will slowly erode the children’s heart and make them gradually lose self-confidence. Even fear.
these three sentences Scolding a child is very toxic and can easily hurt the child’s self-confidence.
The Austrian psychologist Alfred Adler has been committed to studying people’s inferiority complex. He believes that children in childhood, if they are often affected by their own self-confidence. Parents, elders, teachers, etc. devalue it, and it is easy to bury a sense of inferiority deep down in my heart.
According to statistics, the following three sentences are the biggest blow to children, and they are often said by parents——
1, “Why are you so useless, you can’t do a little thing!”
When a child makes a mistake, the parents will instinctively criticize it. It may be just a word unintentionally said, or it may be for the children’s good and want to motivate them to realize their own mistakes, and Make corrections.
But the above sentence is a kind of personality judgment, which is likely to hurt the children’s heart and leave a shadow in their hearts, making the baby lose confidence and feel that they are very useless, and everyone will be worth it. Not on.
2, “Look at the xx next door, how much better than you, then look at yourself…”
I believe many parents have said similar things, other people’s Children seem to be the nightmare of every child when they are young. No matter how well they do, there will always be someone better than themselves.
But in fact, when parents say this, they are trying to motivate their children to become better and better. They don’t know that this way is easy to suppress their baby’s self-confidence and feel that they are inferior to others, which breeds Inferiority complex.
3. “No matter how you do this every day, don’t let me worry about it.”
Many parents blurt out such words when their children make mistakes. Although the speaker has no intention, the listener has the heart.
Such words can make children feel that they are bad, and they have to make their parents worry about themselves every day, thus becoming more and more inferior.
When a child makes a mistake , How do parents educate correctly?
1. Teach patiently
Parents should not blindly get angry or angry when their children make mistakes. This method often cannot solve any problems, but will cause harm to the children’s mind. Parents should first control Take good care of your emotions, communicate with your baby patiently, and understand the causes and consequences of things.
2, guide children to take responsibility
After parents understand the whole process of their children making mistakes, they need to slowly guide them so that they understand what went wrong and how to correct them, and at the same time learn Take the corresponding responsibilities.
3. Lead by example
Parents want their children to make fewer mistakes, so they need to lead by example, set a good example, prevent children from making mistakes, influence children in subtle ways, and guide their children to establish correctness His outlook on life, ethics, and values, and understand some rules of how people do things. The husband asked for an accompanying delivery, but after entering the delivery room Persuaded, midwife: Who on earth are you two having a baby
Writer: Chen Fang
Editor: Liu Yizhi
Finalized: Su Zihou
When it comes to giving birth, mothers should be the most nervous and scared person. However, in recent years, many people have realized that giving birth is a matter of the whole family, so Bao Dad always chooses to have a paternity.
But in the process of paternity, many bao dads were more nervous than pregnant mothers because they were not prepared enough psychologically, and on the contrary, they made the delivery more difficult——
The pictures in this article are all from the Internet, and the pictures and texts are not relevant
The husband offered to have a paternity, but he was persuaded at the moment he entered the delivery room
Some time ago, such a treasured father became popular. Xiao Wang, like other women who gave birth for the first time, has no experience, so he felt very nervous when he was about to give birth. When he saw this, his husband offered to have a paternity.
Xiao Wang felt very moved at first, and even felt a little relaxed, but when he entered the delivery room, her husband seemed to be embarrassed, and even the hand holding her was gradually tightening.
Until Baoma started production At that time, the husband started the broken thoughts mode, and he said some silly things, and even started to cry. Let the midwife call out: Who on earth is giving birth to the two of you.
When Xiao Wang saw this, he said to her husband disgustedly: “Go out. I expected you to come in and cheer, but it didn’t help.” Seeing this, the husband had no choice but to leave.
The significance of the husband’s accompany with labor
1) Give comfort and encouragement
Pregnant mothers who give birth for the first time are usually nervous before giving birth. Emotions can affect the process of labor, and the husband’s co-production can help her to ease her mood.
Surveys show that pregnant women whose husbands are accompanied by labor usually give birth more smoothly and have a lower chance of having a dystocia.
The main reason is that the husband cheers on the pregnant woman or chats during the confinement, which can not only divert her attention, but also give psychological comfort, and the birth process will be smoother.
2) Have empathy
The birth process of pregnant mothers is hard and painful, but in many cases, the family members outside the delivery room, especially the husband, may not be aware of this pain.
Through paternity, you can not only witness the baby’s birth process with your own eyes, but also understand the pain of the pregnant mother during childbirth, have empathy, and be more considerate and take care of the pregnant mother in later life.
3) Enhance the relationship between husband and wife< /p>
The survey shows that after 80% of husbands accompany their wife to give birth, the relationship between husband and wife will be more harmonious.
This is mainly because during the entire production process, the hardships experienced by the wife will become a selfless sacrifice in the eyes of the husband. Therefore, after giving birth, she will naturally want to do more. Things to repay the wife’s dedication, naturally can also enhance the relationship between the two sides.
The husband should do these things during childbirth.
①Prepare for childbirth.
When the wife is about to give birth, the father-to-be should pass in advance Learn about women’s childbirth in various ways, prepare in advance, and you can also participate in some prenatal counseling classes to communicate and share with some prospective fathers. Of course, the most important thing is to be psychologically prepared to face your wives The refusal should also be communicated clearly in time.
②Providing assistance during paternity
When the pregnant mother enters the production process, that is, when the paternity officially arrives, the husband should know his own position, that is, to assist and help the pregnant mother, no matter what kind of doctor or nurse is sitting. In her work, the husband should always be by the side of the mother to give comfort and encouragement.
③Help the puerpera to use routine nursing items after childbirth
The puerpera may need some items after delivery, such as breastfeeding underwear, sanitary napkins for removing lochia, etc. The husband should all Take it out in time for the parturient to use, and pay attention to postpartum care.
Knowledge extension: These types of husbands are not suitable for paternity
A. Husbands with bloody blood
Husbands with this situation are not suitable for paternity, because During the delivery process, whether it is a normal delivery or a cesarean section, there will be blood, which will inevitably cause discomfort. This will not only not help the pregnant woman, but will increase the burden on the doctors and nurses.
B. Poor psychological quality Husbands
Many husbands may not have good psychological quality, and they are prone to nervousness when encountering things, so this situation is not suitable for paternity.
Because the pregnant mother itself is in a very nervous state during the delivery process, if the paternity person also appears in this state, it will only deepen the mother’s anxiety and increase the difficulty of delivery.
C, a bad-tempered husband
Some husbands are usually more irritable and irritable. When they are in paternity, watching their wife have difficulty in giving birth, it is easy to blame the pain on the medical staff and have a quarrel with them. This will naturally affect the smooth production, so it is not suitable for co-production.
[Today’s Topic] When you give birth, do you want your husband to go in to accompany the childbirth?