How do parents with a high school education cultivate their post-doctorate children? Few people can do this.
Since ancient times, it has been difficult to get a good son, but there will always be counterexamples, otherwise the class will be completely solidified. But today, obtaining a high degree of education through reading to achieve class transition is the most typical and most operational way.
There is a couple in Hunan. Both of them only went to high school and were engaged in ordinary occupations, but the two insisted on training their son to become a postdoctoral fellow, and he was also studying at a prestigious foreign university.
This matter has become a good talk in the local area, and the parents of the post-doctorate have also become famous and become local celebrities. Many people also make a special trip to ask for a “parenting experience.”
But really speaking, the couple’s parenting experience is not special. Even most parents can do what they want. However, the problem is persistence. Almost no one can persist for a year or a half according to their method, let alone ten. several years.
For example, in order to let her son learn English well, a mother who has never studied at university and has not reached the fourth level of English proficiency just raised her English to the sixth level.
With her training, her son’s English scores have improved by leaps and bounds, and the effect is even better than that of a professional cram school.
Similarly, in order to make up for the shortcomings of his son’s language, my father took his son to read for more than ten years. The training course for my son during the winter and summer vacations is a long way away, and my father personally picks up his son home after get off work every day, rain or shine.
In their own words, they should treat their son’s studies as their parents’ own career, at least an important sideline to do. This is the real reason why they used limited resources to train their sons with post-doctoral degrees.
In fact, money is the easiest way for parents to invest in their children’s education, while energy and patience are the most difficult.
Unfortunately, many parents have fallen into the misunderstanding that “money can solve everything”, thinking that as long as they go to the most expensive school and go to the most expensive cram school, their children’s grades will be good. If you train your children with this kind of mentality, you may end up being slapped by reality.
Parents with low education The key to cultivating high-educated children lies in these points.
1. Make progress with the children
Low academic qualifications are not terrible. The terrible thing is that they have lost their enterprising spirit. The ancients understood that “learning is endless.” The truth.
If parents are aware of this, work hard to improve their cultural level, and accompany their children to progress together, they can always maintain the ability to support their children in their studies.
For example, the mother with a high school education, for her son to study English, is to make progress with her child.
This approach not only allows children and parents to be promoted simultaneously, but also avoids communication barriers between parents and children.
Otherwise, even if the son has a high degree of education, there is no common language between parents and children, which is a very tragic thing.
2. Use external forces to stimulate children’s enthusiasm for learning
Interest is the best teacher, because interest is often accompanied by strong internal drive. But not every child is interested in learning, so in learning, many children’s internal drive is often insufficient.
To solve this problem, the best way is to take external stimuli to let children gain internal drive. Simply put, it is to drive children through reasonable rewards and punishments.
This does not require the parents to have a high degree of education, but only requires the parents to know enough about the child and know what kind of rewards and punishments are effective for the child.
3. Help children find the most suitable learning method
What really allows children to make a leap in learning is not to spend more time learning, but to improve learning efficiency through scientific methods.
After all, there is so much time in a day, even if you use all of it, it is difficult to make a qualitative change. But improving efficiency is not the same. To achieve the same result, it may only take one-tenth or even less of the usual time when the efficiency is high.
So parents should pay attention to the child’s learning status, tap his potential, help and guide him to establish a good learning method, this is the way to let the child dominate the sea of learning.
It is entirely possible for parents with low education to cultivate children with high education. It just requires parents to have an extraordinary vision and the courage to make a lifetime investment, and of course they cannot do without a certain amount of financial support.
But there is one point that needs special attention. For children in ordinary families, the space for trial and error is extremely limited. Parents must understand the children’s strengths as soon as possible, so as to use the “sword to be biased” style. Invest to make the child achieve a huge improvement.
Discover children’s Specialty is the most important thing parents need to do.
When it comes to the fact that parents with low academic qualifications produce excellent children, I have to mention Yi Qianxi’s mother. She did not even graduate from high school, but she has cultivated two excellent children. son.
Her practice is worthy of reference for ordinary parents, that is, when the child was very young, he discovered his specialties, and then concentrated the limited family resources on it. Back then, she insisted on letting Yi It is this kind of thinking that Aqianxi learns to dance.
The advantage of this is that it does not require too many resources to allow children to make a huge improvement in a certain field, thereby laying a solid foundation for future development.
As parents, there is no educational requirement. As long as the method is right, even parents with low education can do better than many parents with high education.
So when you are a parent, you must have confidence in yourself. Don’t feel inferior because of your low academic qualifications, let alone give up the education and cultivation of your children. Only low-level parents can reason with their children. Experts always deal with their children in this way. I’m not convinced.
Recently, my colleagues always look like they haven’t rested well. When I ask, I find out that she is competing with her son again. . This colleague is a single mother. In order to give her children a happy childhood, she always knows her emotions and reason, but she doesn’t know why the children are becoming more and more disobedient now.
Recently, children always play games until midnight, and colleagues say to the children, “Playing too late will affect learning”, “I will take the college entrance examination next year, and play games for children”, “At night Playing games is bad for eyesight,” but I didn’t expect that the child only replied “I’m so annoying, I can’t tell you the truth”, which made my colleagues very sad. But at noon the next day, my colleague would still call the child so thunderously to remind the child not to go home to play games and remember to eat. The child was also very impatient, so he hung up the phone hastily.
Speaking of children’s problems, in fact, colleagues know better than anyone else, and are also very worried about the child’s future development, but every time he educates the child, he will only attract the child’s dislike, and the child will deliberately do something bad to fight against him . So she didn’t even dare to educate her children, she could only ensure that the children did not make mistakes, or wipe her butt behind the children immediately. Many children, especially adolescent children, hate their parents for being reasoned. Even if they are wrong first, they will not admit their mistakes and persuade them in the face of their parents’ preaching. It is said that beating and scolding a child is wrong, how reasonable is it that the child will be disgusted? This makes it difficult for parents.
Why are children Hate your great principles? Parents and children have their own reasons, especially during adolescence.
Children’s self-awareness becomes stronger
Kindergarten and lower grades are generally better educated. They often regard the words of teachers and parents as golden rules, which are almost rigid. Obey, and as they grow older, they will become less and less able to listen to the education of parents and teachers. Because when they were young, they knew little about the world and themselves, so they thought that everything their parents said was right. But as they grow up, they have a wider range of knowledge and a stronger self-awareness, and they have their own understanding of one thing, and they will no longer accept all the principles of their parents.
Children enter the rebellious period
Children are difficult to teach, and children who enter the rebellious period are even more difficult to teach. Children at this stage, especially boys, are generally high-spirited and always think of themselves very special, so they don’t put others in their eyes. In the face of parents’ principles, they will have a stronger rebellious psychology. Even if they have realized that they have done something wrong, or they are not reasonable, but they are not willing to show weakness and bow their heads in front of their parents.
Parents are too nagging
At the same time, some parents are too unwilling to let go of their children, worrying too much about their children, and they must nag and exhort their children no matter what they do. In the eyes of parents, these are love instructions, but they may be a little redundant for children. Parents who are too nagging like this will inevitably make children impatient or want to use rebellious behavior to get rid of their parents’ nagging. Nowadays, children cannot be beaten or scolded, and parents are worried about how to educate their children. Children are big and small, and the bigger they are, the harder they are to fool. Educating children is actually fighting wits and courage with their children, and smart parents can always outperform their children.
Learn this 3 You can teach good children without beating or scolding or preaching. The last trick is difficult.
Change from preaching to talking
In daily education, parents often unilaterally output, and very Don’t really listen to and value children’s opinions and ideas. In fact, no one likes this kind of communication mode. Therefore, when a child needs education, parents might as well switch from preaching to conversation. First understand why the child does this, his current thinking, and how to deal with it, so that the child can feel respected, so that he can open up his heart with parents and accept their opinions. .
Educating children by changing individuals
Have you noticed a particularly interesting phenomenon? In the family, there is always a person who is more afraid of children. For example, the nephew of a friend next to him is not afraid at home. He often gets into trouble and puts his parents’ words on the ears, but he is only afraid of this friend, that is, his uncle. Because he knew that his uncle wouldn’t make jokes with him, and that he would speak and act in a real way. As soon as he saw his uncle, he immediately persuaded him. Therefore, when Bao’s mother feels strenuous in educating her children, it is better to let her father take the initiative and educate her children kindly.
Let children be properly frustrated and understand the truth.
Practice the truth. The same truth may not work if parents say it a thousand times, and the child will have a long memory as long as he suffers a loss. Therefore, sometimes parents can also allow their children to be appropriately frustrated and understand their own good intentions in the social reality. Parents always overprotect their children, and painstaking education does not work for children at all. Only by letting the children go through it can they truly understand what is right and wrong, but this is difficult for many parents to do.
Looking back on our growth process, we also have a stage where we don’t like parental preaching. This is a necessary process in the growth process of children. Therefore, parents don’t need to be too anxious when their children are unable to listen. There is no panacea in this matter, and they need to act according to the situation of their children. How do you educate such children?