Don’t talk and worry about children? Don’t blindly force your children to express themselves. It’s good to have these kinds of behaviors.
Beibei is a fourth-grade student in elementary school. He usually likes to be alone and doesn’t like the excitement. His parents do it every day. Finding ways to let the children communicate with them, wanting to make the children lively, always feel that the children are not talking is a problematic performance, eager to understand the children’s heart.
However, Beibei is actually a lively child. He is only lively when he should be lively, thinking when he should be thinking, children with this personality are really smart.
They know how to calm down and contemplate, understand the world through observation, and improve their thinking through thinking.
I like to study toys by myself.
There are some in life Children like to play with toys with their little friends, but they also like to stay and study toys and study the play and composition of toys.
We can’t say that the former doesn’t like research, but we can’t say that the latter lacks liveliness. After all, every child has a different way of playing with toys. Children who play together can learn to share while playing. , But children who study alone can also gain knowledge in the process of playing.
Eat seriously at the dinner table
Some parents are very I like to talk to my child while eating. I feel that my child has very little time to talk to his family after returning home from school.
Sitting with a family to eat together is a good opportunity to chat and enhance relationships, but the ancients once said that “you can’t speak while eating,” although from a medical point of view, not talking while eating is to avoid being caught It is unhygienic to choke on the saliva with the food, but eating seriously is also an aspect that can tell whether the child is attentive or not.
A child who eats seriously is not that he is not talkative, or just waiting for the meal to have a good chat with his family.
like to stare at something
I have met I have been to a child who likes to stare at a food. The people around him are very strange. They think that the child is always jumping and jumping. I am also curious about how it is possible to sit there motionless and watch things all the time.
But when I asked him what he was looking at, he actually replied, “I was thinking about why the traffic light at that intersection should be set to change the light every 60 seconds.” Will you blame the child for not talking to the parents, right?
This also means that children who like to stare at something may be curious, rather than introverted and not talkative.
Do not speak actively in front of unfamiliar people
Finally, many parents now want their children to talk more in front of others, as if this way can show their children’s intelligence.
However, in fact, children who do not actively speak in front of unfamiliar people may be more attractive and make people think they are smarter. In addition to people’s ignorance of children who do not actively speak, It’s also because the child observes while not speaking, and gains cognition through observation, so as to understand the person in front of him.
Don’t just do it right away if your child doesn’t like to talk The conclusion is introverted. If your child is silent when he should speak when he should be silent, and he is good at observing, then he must be a smart baby! “Grandma gave me less red envelopes than my grandma.” The 6-year-old girl’s unintentional remarks point to family conflicts
Nowadays, although the patriarchal thought has gradually faded in the minds of young parents, it is undeniable. This phenomenon still exists, especially in the traditional ideas of the older generation.
If there is a boy in the family, then this is a symbol of exuberance in the hearts of the older generations, and it means that the family can be passed on, so you can get used to it when it comes to the education of boys, for fear that there will be a little bit of it. accident.
But if you give birth to a girl, you will not be so lucky. After all, in the eyes of the elderly, the girl will marry sooner or later. There will be obvious differences in attitudes towards granddaughters or granddaughters.
“The red envelopes my grandma gave me were not as many as my grandma gave me” , The 6-year-old girl said unintentionally, telling the family conflicts
Since Song Wen married her husband Li Hao, she has been living near her mother-in-law’s house. After all, they also considered that the two sides could take care of each other in the future.
Actually, Song Wen did receive a lot of care from her mother-in-law when she was pregnant, but after giving birth, her mother-in-law’s attitude took a 180° turn, and the reason is that Song Wensheng A girl.
Fortunately, her husband, Li Hao, is more reasonable. During Song Wen’s confinement period, he took the initiative to learn from Song Wen’s mother how to take care of the mother and child. Although Song Wen felt aggrieved about this, but watching his lovely daughter grow up day by day, he devoted himself to the child’s eating and drinking, and he was relieved of the mother-in-law’s all sorts of things.
However, mother-in-law’s patriarchal thought is really serious, and she will come over to add a block if nothing happens. It’s not that somebody’s daughter-in-law gave birth to a boy and her tone is full of envy, but she came to urge Song Wen to ask A second child.
Although Song Wen has a good temper, he is a little overwhelmed by her mother-in-law’s nagging. However, it is comforting that her husband has always respected Song Wen’s ideas.
Seeing that the daughter is 6 years old and is already at school, the couple discussed who will pick up the child to school. Unexpectedly, when asking the child’s opinion, the child was the first to oppose the grandmother’s pick up and said : “Grandma said she likes boys and doesn’t like me. Grandma likes me. For my birthday, my grandma gave me less red envelopes than my grandma gave!”
I have to say that the unintentional remark of a 6-year-old girl also inadvertently revealed a lot of family conflicts. In fact, most of the old people are more traditional in thinking. They may prefer boys to girls, but for girls who are grandchildren, the old people’s careless behavior will only chill the children’s hearts.
So what is the experience of patriarchal patriotism?
In fact, many netizens have had the experience of being despised because of their patriarchal thinking.
@柠檬浅水绿柠檬片: “I heard my mom say that when my mom gave birth to me, my grandma turned her head and left when she saw that she was a girl. She didn’t even buy an egg for her mother. It really helped my mom. Feeling wronged.”
@是虫不山”My grandma has liked my brother more since I was a child. I think about my brother if there is something delicious, and I will eat it only if my brother doesn’t want it. I would rather not have such a grandma!”
From this point of view, there is this There are not a few old people with this kind of thinking, but in fact, this kind of behavior of the elders not only affects the relationship between the generations, but also produces indelible harm to the growth of the children.
What effect will such an elderly have on children?
It may make the child fall into self-doubt
As a child, if the elderly can’t do a good job, they will have a self-doubt mentality for the child. All aspects are not good, and the elderly cannot be affirmed. If things go on like this, it will hinder children’s self-confidence building.
It will affect the formation of children’s normal three views< /p>
The formation of the three views of children is a process of gradual accumulation. If the elderly cannot treat children equally, it will lead to a wrong guide for the children, which will affect the children’s outlook on life, values and even the world. Formation will be counterproductive in the future.
It will also affect the parent-child relationship between the elderly and children
An old saying goes “separate generations”, which means that the grandparents of the next generations are more likely to get along with each other. If the elderly do not face up to the wrong concept of patriarchy, the relationship between grandparents will be in In a state of tension, children will naturally alienate the elderly.