Children’s grades are important, but it’s meaningless without it. Parents need to know which one is more important
In a blink of an eye, it’s time for winter vacation again. Children are about to usher in the end of semester exams, whether they are children or Parents, all hope to have a good result.
If your child’s grades are very good, then everyone will be happy, but if the child does not do well in the exam and the grades are not satisfactory, many parents will start to criticize their children, “Why are you so unbelievable? It’s a double percent!” “I paid you so much money to sign up for a cram school, so you got this score. It’s so disappointing!”…
Parents care about their children very much. Academic performance, after all, the pressure of education is now increasing. It is difficult to get a good university with poor grades, and it is difficult to find a good job in the future.
Therefore, parents are doing their best to pay for their children, paying high prices to enroll their children in various cram schools, saving their food and sending their children to good schools. But as long as a child has good grades, does it mean that he can have a good future in the future? Can grades determine everything?
Let’s first look at such a real case. In order to send her son to a world-renowned school, a mother in Hangzhou established a strict learning plan for her child since she was young. You can’t do anything unrelated to learning.
Not only does he not let his son go out to play, he refuses to make friends with him, but he also refuses to let his son do the daily small things like eating and dressing, because these will delay the time of study. When my son was in high school, he wouldn’t wear his own clothes. When eating, his mother would feed his son while letting him recite vocabulary.
In this way, the son was admitted to a world-renowned school with a high score. The mother finally realized her wish, but Before the half semester was over, the school expelled his son for reasons such as poor self-care ability, poor interpersonal skills, and inability to adapt to the collective.
At this time, the mother realized that it is not enough to pay attention only to the children’s academic performance. Grades are important, but without a sound personality and independent ability, it will be difficult for them to move into society.
Children’s academic performance is important, but what determines a person’s life is a sound personality.
I still remember a high-achieving student named Wu Xieyu from Peking University. He was a child of someone else’s family since he was a child. He is not only a schoolmaster, but also has a wide range of interests. All aspects are much better than others.
Mother has also been strict with him since he was a child, and worked so hard to train her son to become a top student in a prestigious school, but the result is unimaginable. Wu Xieyu actually killed his mother with his own hands, and then handled the corpse calmly. I also pretended to be my mother to send messages to relatives and friends, everything I did was perfect.
Although such a child has excellent grades, he is cruel in his heart, and on the surface is a stellar student, but in fact he is very conscientious.
Although it is not easy for Wu Xieyu’s mother to pull her son, but in the process of cultivating her son, the mother only pays attention to the child’s academic performance, ignoring the shaping of his personality and conduct, and the learning requirements Too harsh, so that the son can not feel the mother’s love, so that the son went astray.
The educator Mr. Cai Yuanpei once said in the book “Chinese Cultivation” that “it is not academic performance that determines a child’s life, but a sound personality!”
So there is no A healthy personality, no matter how good academic performance is, is futile. An unsound personality, like a crooked little tree, can hardly become a useful talent. So as a parent, how should you cultivate a healthy personality for your child? From which aspects should you start?
How to train children Sound personality
1. Give children full love and company, respect and understanding
Many parents love their children very much and are willing to spend money on their children, even if they are frugal, they must let their children Have good material conditions. But material satisfaction is not true love. True love is acceptance from the heart, full companionship and understanding, and sufficient respect.
As mentioned in Maslow’s demand theory, a person’s most basic needs are survival needs, such as food and clothing. After the survival needs are met, the more advanced needs are the sense of belonging, the sense of security, and the spiritual needs. Only when the advanced needs are met, the personality will be healthy.
So in addition to letting children eat and drink well, parents must spend more time with their children, listen to their children’s ideas, respect their wishes, and don’t impose their will on their children so that they can feel Enough love can lay the foundation for a sound personality.
2. Cultivate children’s independent ability
Children are growing up, and one day they need to live independently. Therefore, as parents, they must cultivate their children’s ability to take care of themselves from an early age to help their children become a life and personality All independent people.
If you lose the ability to be independent, no matter how good your academic performance is, it will be difficult to adapt to society. A person who can only learn but not be independent can only be a “giant baby” who does not grow up.
To cultivate children’s independent ability, parents should not overwhelm their children, and let them do what they can do. When your child wants to eat on his own, don’t be afraid to stain the floor, although let the child eat by himself.
Teach the children to dress and wear shoes by themselves, tidy up their own rooms, and tidy up the toys they have played with. Children’s schoolbags are for them to carry on their own, and their homework is done by themselves.
3. Cultivate children’s emotional quotient
Emotional quotient is more important than IQ. Emotional quotient can determine how much a person can achieve. If you lack EQ, it is difficult to make a difference no matter how good you study.
So parents should pay attention to the cultivation of children’s emotional quotient from an early age, first help children to understand their own emotions, and then learn to deal with negative emotions in a reasonable way.
Then teach the children to think in different positions, to be able to perceive and understand the emotions of others, so that the children can do well in interpersonal communication, cooperate better with others, and be more likely to succeed. These three foods carry sex hormones. Children eat more and tend to “precocious puberty”, but parents use them as treasures.
Perhaps parents have also observed that many children now have a tendency to “precocious puberty”. Know where the problem is. Part of the age is not yet up to the standard, but the body begins to develop early, which makes parents sweat for their children, fearing that their children will be affected in the future.
9-year-old Zhouzhou was taken to the village clinic by his grandmother last week. Because it was a rural clinic, he was almost always in the lobby when seeing a doctor. Everyone’s condition would be heard clearly.
The child’s grandmother said, “This child is only 9 years old, and he will develop. What should I do? Is there any way to let her eliminate it?” Later, the doctor gave Zhouzhou an injection and it really started. Some effects, but it didn’t take long for it to bulge again. Now grandma can’t help but call Zhouzhou’s mother.
After all, it is related to the child’s development. Mother Zhouzhou rushed back and took the child to a big hospital in the city. After the doctor’s examination, it was clear that the child was precocious!
As a child’s mother, I am naturally scared, but from a doctor’s point of view, I have experienced too many such cases in recent years, so I disagree and ask about the child’s usual diet.
Mother Zhouzhou all came out, but the doctor did not get the answer he wanted, and then asked, “Does the child usually take any health products?”
Mom He shook his head, but then remembered that the child usually takes height-enhancing medicine. When the doctor heard this answer, he was basically able to conclude that it was caused by the increase drug, because so many children with precocious puberty have been treated, except for some of them that are indeed their own problems, the others are basically caused by extra hormones.
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These three foods carry “sex hormones”. Children eat more and tend to “precocious puberty”, but parents regard them as Bao
Let’s talk about one thing I have experienced. About six or seven years ago, I hadn’t moved into the city, and I was still living in a town. , Once a large truck drove into the town, the other party found an open space and began to place things, and then they took small horns and went to the main road first to inform that there was a show to watch at night.
Through this trick, many villagers were attracted. At first they did perform performances, but later they began to sell height-increasing drugs, and the promotion was very moving. “The child grew 5 cm tall after eating for a year. No problem left or right.”
Everyone was half-trusted at first, and then he said, “We are all regular manufacturers, and we went to the countryside just to make a sign. There is our manufacturer’s address and phone number behind the bottle of medicine. , If you have any questions, you can call for consultation.”
But when I took a bottle and looked at it, I found that it was a three-no product. At that time, I quietly reported to the police. Then the police came and they panicked. It was indeed identified by the police as a Sanwu product, and the goods were taken away with them.
Some people may think that in all ages, they only go to pharmacies to buy height-enhancing drugs, and that is the guarantee. In fact, this is not the case. Although my country’s monitoring of the market has been much stronger over the years, driven by interests, some black-hearted manufacturers have used various means to put drugs into pharmacies and sell them in pharmacies. Last year, they paid them back. “Break down” many such pharmacies without products.
The vast majority of these so-called heightening drugs are caused by hormones, which do harm to the child’s body. Precocious puberty is only one of the injuries, and severely may hinder the child’s development. , Or cause other diseases.
2. Health care products
Similarly, health care products are also regarded as “treasures” by parents. Under the excellent eloquence of salesmen, parents are mostly regarded as “physical” and “puzzling”. The words “increasing height” can be deceived. It can be said that the child’s daily diet is more expensive. You can skip meals, but you must eat health products.
In fact, some health care products are controlled. Although it is said that they will not cause any harm to children, they are equivalent to paying an IQ tax and eating them as ordinary starchy foods.
There are also some health products that, after escaping supervision, will also add a lot of hormones, which may also lead to precocious puberty in their children, but many parents will not attribute this problem to health products.
3. Fried foods
In addition to the above two foods, fried foods may also cause precocious puberty in children, which most parents have not paid attention to.
Be aware that most children like to eat fried foods because they have better taste. However, after a large amount of fried foods are consumed, if too much fat accumulates on the children’s body, they will This leads to changes in body hormone values, stimulates the secretion of sex hormones, and triggers precocious puberty in children.
In addition, eating too much fried food may not only affect the child’s aspect, but may also cause problems in the child’s health, including gastrointestinal digestion, spleen, etc. These dysfunctions will also Affect the normal growth and development of the child.
I hope that parents can rationally treat their children’s growth and development problems. Under the condition of ensuring a healthy daily diet, supervise the children to exercise more. Most of the height development will not be affected. On the contrary, it is easier to stimulate by foreign objects. There are problems, and most of the effects are irreversible.