Big difference in personality between the boss and the second? Experts say: birth order does affect the child’s character development
Adler, an individual psychologist, believes that the birth order of a child in the family has a very important impact on the child’s future development of personality and psychology.
Finalized: After Su Zi
There is a sentence in “Positive Discipline”: The different order in which children are born is like in a play Different roles have their own distinct personality characteristics.
Families with many children have a very interesting phenomenon: in second-child families, the personality differences between the eldest and the second child are often relatively large, and the birth order also affects the development of the children’s personality to a certain extent. .
In families with many children, the eldest and the second have different personalities.
①We are born in the 1980s
Lele is the youngest in the family. At home, the eldest sister is strong and domineering; the second sister is well-behaved Honest, quiet and restrained; while Lele, as the youngest daughter, has a mischievous and outgoing character.
The two elder brothers of the neighbor’s house and the two cousins of the second uncle’s house also showed amazing consistency in personality. Brothers tend to be more outgoing and talkative than younger brothers, while younger brothers are more introverted and silent.
All the pictures in this article are from the Internet, and the pictures and texts are irrelevant
Although on the surface, the birth order will affect the child’s personality to a certain extent, but it is related to the child’s future Achievement does not seem to matter much.
The neighbor’s elder brother is more accomplished than his younger brother. The two go out to do business together. The elder brother is very sociable and enthusiastic, and is very popular in business, while the younger brother is the opposite.
The younger brother of the cousin’s family is a technical, quiet personality, can calm down to study equipment, technology is becoming more and more mature, but the older brother is not satisfactory.
②. Uncles and uncles born in the 6070s
When the parents were young, they were families with many children. There were many boys in the family, and it was obvious that the boss’s personality tends to be more outgoing and lively and talkative, while the second child They tend to be introverted, tolerant and less language.
The formation of such a character was very obvious in the last century without parental intervention.
At that time, many parents were busy with livelihood issues all day long, and did not have much time to discipline their children and let their children develop freely, so such very distinctive differences and characteristics were formed.
③The same is true abroad
The famous British novelist Jane Austen’s famous book “Pride and Prejudice” tells the character and personality of Mrs. Bennett’s five daughters in different birth orders. The status of their married life.
Compared with her sister Jane, who is enthusiastic and talkative, the second-ranked heroine Elizabeth is more restrained. But neither of their personalities prevented them from finding a good marriage partner.
The five sisters of the protagonist are naturally indulgent and lawless, and they don’t listen to anyone’s words. In the end, because of their waywardness, they don’t say marrying a bad person, and they are also ridiculed by the surrounding neighbors. Although the performance of the fourth sister is not obedient, it is much better than the fifth sister.
You can also see if the personalities of the people around you conform to this rule-children with cardinal numbers are more extroverted, and children with even numbers are more introverted.
The order of birth affects the character of the child to a certain extent
■The first child
The first child born in the family has a time of exclusive parenthood, and it is the parents Attention and love wholeheartedly.
After the younger siblings are born, they will inevitably feel uncomfortable and feel that their parents have been taken away by this newcomer. This is especially true among siblings with a small age gap.
Children are too young to think as maturely as adults. The most intuitive manifestation is to do everything possible to attract the attention of parents, and to show an outgoing personality in long-term development.
■The second child
The second child born in the family is completely uncompetitive compared to his siblings, so he will choose to forbear, in order not to compete with his siblings, They rarely express themselves, so they have formed a more introverted character.
■The third child
If a third child is born, then the second child will not compete with the third child like the first child because of the habit. The character of this child turned to lively and outgoing.
Because of the pressure of the second child, the first child has a much lower sense of competition with the third child. There is the condition to fully develop one’s extrovert personality.
Children only have different personalities, but there is no difference between good and bad. Parents try their best to have a bowl of water.
What mistakes do parents often make in the path of parenting children that make their children feel unfair?
✦The big one should let the small one
Parents intended that the older children take care of the younger children, but doing so will not only fail to make the older children love the younger children, but on the contrary It will make older children feel that their younger brothers and sisters have taken away their parents’ love for them, and they don’t like them even more.
And children understand that they are younger, everyone has to let me, so as to develop a very domineering self-character.
A better approach is to communicate with the two children alone. If you have something good, you must remember to share it with your younger siblings or siblings. The siblings should know how to love each other.
✦Compare children with each other
If parents often say something like this: You look at older brothers (sisters, younger brothers, younger sisters) are very obedient, but you can’t compare them.
Such words and behaviors often cause family conflicts, hurt the feelings between the children, and cause quarrels and fights between children, so that they do not move around and are not intimate when they grow up.
In a family with multiple children growing up, parents should intervene appropriately so that the children can develop healthily, promote the feelings and bonds between children, and help children help each other as adults, rather than forming strangers. Return to Sohu to see more
A 34-year-old woman gave birth to 7 babies in 13 years. Still having fun, saying that she can’t waste her husband’s good genes
A 34-year-old woman gave birth to 7 babies in 13 years, and she’s still having fun, saying that she can’t waste her husband’s good genes
Wen | Mom’s Tao (Senior maternal and child nurse, original is not easy, please do not plagiarize)
In this age when young people are unwilling to have children or just want to have one child, those parents and women who are willing to have a few children, just Become the object of everyone’s doubts:
“Why are there so many births? Is there a mine at home?”
“Giving birth to a child will cause a lot of damage to women’s bodies. Injury, how many births, can the body bear it?”
Recently, a mother who posted the life of her family of 9 on the Internet caused a lot of discussion because she had too many children. .
34-year-old female 13-year-old 7 A baby, but she doesn’t want to waste her husband’s good genes
This mother uploaded a video on the Internet to show her life with her seven children. The few people get along very harmoniously, happily, and enjoy themselves well.
The pictures in this article are all from Internet, pictures and texts are irrelevant
She said that she started having children when she married her husband at the age of 21. Now she has given birth to 7 children in 13 years. She also said that she is voluntary and feels Very happy.
When everyone asked about the reasons and motivation for having children, Bao Ma said: “My husband is very smart and cannot waste his good genes. I hope the child can inherit her husband’s IQ, or compare He is smarter.”
In a family, children are less likely to be smart.
Although a large part of people’s IQ is inherited from their parents, it is similar to that inherited from both parents. Boys’ IQ is even more susceptible to Mother’s influence.
Moreover, the IQ of several siblings in a family will also vary according to the order of birth:
The intelligence of the boss may be the highest. The younger children may be stupid.
United States The Proceedings of the Academy of Sciences once found through investigations that the intelligence of the first born child is generally higher than that of subsequent children.
▶ The influence of family resources
Psychologists say that the first child born has more resources than other children at the developmental stage, so the intelligence may be higher .
The subsequent children may not be taken care of by the whole family, so they are a bit inferior to a child in terms of intellectual development.
▶ Pregnancy impact
There is some competition in the process of inheritance of human genes. Studies have shown that every time a mother gives birth to a child, the level of certain antibodies in the body will increase , Which will affect the brain development of the next child.
▶ Liability impact
After the first child is born, the younger sibling may realize his responsibility as the eldest son, so he becomes more mature and may work harder in his studies.
Furthermore, in the process of taking care of younger siblings, the boss communicates more with his family, which can also promote intellectual development.
However, for mothers who like children, whether they are smart or smart is not important. Although the mainstream voice in society is not having children or having fewer children, there are still many parents who like to have children.
Why are some women willing to give birth to that How many children?
▶ Taking childbearing as a woman’s responsibility
Some women believe that childbearing is the responsibility of every woman. Life without children is incomplete. In fact, they demand it with this idea There is nothing wrong with oneself, but kidnapping others shouldn’t be right.
Yang Liping’s dance Are the films and sketches of Jia Ling not enough to contribute to the society? Why do you still need to have children to ask them?
▶ Love to take care of children
There are indeed many women who like children and also enjoy the process of taking care of children.
For example, Cecilia Cheung, a female star in Hong Kong, China, when her two sons grew up, she gave birth to a third child a few years ago. The reason she gave is that she likes to take care of children. Growing up, you will feel insecure.
A Japanese mother also gave birth to 12 children in 20 years. It takes a lot of time to prepare food and do housework for the children every day.
But this mother is happy Among them, she never lost her temper to her children and liked them, and she became the best mother in the eyes of her children. The family lived happily and happily.
▶ Need the company of children
The well-known Hong Kong star Chen Haomin and his wife had 4 children. Now they may have 5 more children. Netizens asked why, Chen Haomin Said:
Because he is often outside filming and is very busy at work, he hopes that these children will accompany his wife.
Regardless of whether you have children or how many children, I hope that every family will have a happy and happy life.
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